Dancing on a Star Chapter 27
I awakened Saturday morning when my mother came into the room and sat down on the side of the bed. She announced, “Your father left earlier for a meeting, and he won’t be home until after midnight.” She looked at her watch and added, “I’m going shopping with Karen. I’m taking her to the mall for new shoes, and then we’re going to see a movie.” She reached out and patted my hand. “Is there anything you need?”
I replied, “No, Mom.”
“But you’re starting school again Monday,” she said. She looked at my bare feet and asked, “Do you need new shoes?”
I was surprised how cheerful her mood was. I think it was the first time she had spoken to me like we used to talk. She was almost motherly again. Perhaps, everyone was right. Maybe she did need time to sort things out. I knew my next question would test her acceptance.
“Can I invite Jeff over to stay while you’re out?”
She sat back and looked off in the distance. I think even she knew this was an important moment. If she refused, then she knew I would blow up and become upset. She probably even knew I would invite Jeff over as soon as she and Karen left.
And agreeing would show a degree of acceptance. She was beginning to accept that Jeff might be more than just a friend. However, was she ready to accept me having a boyfriend? If she did, then she would accept that I am gay.
We sat in awkward silence for what seemed like an eternity, but it was more like twenty seconds. She reached out and patted my hand. “Of course, you can invite Jeff to keep you company.” I smiled and nodded until she asked, “Can I trust you?”
My eyes narrowed. “Trust me? Why?” I felt ready to explode again. The good feelings I felt earlier began to disappear.
“Never mind,” she replied angrily as she rose from the bed. “You’ll do it anyway,” she muttered as she left the room. She hollered out and told Karen to hurry. A few minutes later they left the house. She didn’t even look in the room to say goodbye.
I waited about fifteen minutes before calling Jeff. It was a little past ten, and I wasn’t sure if he was out of bed yet. Before my accident, I sometimes slept until noon, especially if I had been up late watching movies. When Jimmy would sleep over, it wasn’t unusual for us to stay up until 2 or 3 watching scary movies. When we were younger, we would be so afraid that we sometimes couldn’t fall asleep for an hour or two. Naturally, we would never admit to each other that we were scared.
I still can’t believe that Jimmy and I spent almost every weekend during the summer together without mentioning what we were both feeling. From what Jimmy has said, it sounds like he thought about sex more than I did. When we were lying in bed, I never had an urge to do anything with him as we grew older.
We did suck each other when we were eleven or twelve, but it was usually as a dare. Thinking back, Jimmy always seemed to be the one to initiate the playfulness. He would first pull down his underwear, showing his little erection. Then, he would dare me to do it. He was the first of us to grow hair, and we would check to see when I would. By the time we were thirteen, both of us had a small tuft of hair. Around that time, Jimmy also was the first of us to produce cum. Three months later, I was able to do it. For a few months, we would have ‘races’ to see who could cum first.
However, I was beginning to question that I might be gay. Even though Jimmy didn’t seem to care, I was afraid that he would learn my secret if we continued. One night I told him that we should stop since we were getting older, and I didn’t feel comfortable doing it anymore. He seemed disappointed, but he agreed. But now I realize that we could have continued, and we probably would have enjoyed it. Jimmy confessed that he wished we had. As he said, we could have been having fun all these years. However, we were too afraid to confess that we might be gay.
From what Jimmy has said, it appears that he and Brian may have continued even as we got older. Now, I’m confused if Brian might be gay too. Jimmy seemed to indicate that it was nothing more than just teen experimenting, but maybe it is more. However, Brian has been showing an interesting in dating girls. I suppose I’ll find out if Jimmy does come out. If Brian comes out too, I’m not sure what I’ll do. All these years we’ve been friends, and then I find out that we all kept the same secret.
Jeff was up when I called. However, he said he couldn’t come over because he was helping his father move furniture in the basement family room. His mother had bought a new sofa, and he had to help him carry the old one outside, load it on his father’s truck and take it to Goodwill. He said he would stop by when they finished, but it would probably be a few hours.
I sat and looked out the window. Tracy’s curtains were still closed, so I assumed he was still asleep. He was now spending most evenings after school practicing for the Nutcracker. I guess since he had a bigger part in the show, it was going to take up more of his time. He needed his rest, and I didn’t want to wake him just to come over and keep me company.
I closed my eyes and was almost asleep when I heard a car door slam. It couldn’t be my mother and Karen. They had only been gone about thirty minutes. I heard a key in the door, and then Stephanie and Darren entered. My sister came over and hugged me tightly. “How are you, Jack?” she asked.
I smiled and replied, “I’m okay. I’m bored as hell, though.” I looked at Darren when he said hello and fisted me.
“What brings you home?” I asked. “Don’t you have classes?”
“It’s Saturday,” said Stephanie. “We don’t have Saturday classes.” She looked around the room and into the hall. “Is Mom home?”
“No,” I told her. “She took Karen to the mall.”
“How are you and Mom getting along? Are things any better?”
I explained that she seemed to be accepting that fact I’m gay. I told her about my fall and how I had called Jeff to help me. I also told her how she seemed to be treating him and Tracy better.
“It takes time,” responded Darren. “We told you that last week.”
“Yeah,” I nodded. “I just hope it doesn’t take too long.” I looked out the window and exclaimed again, “I’m bored.”
“Let’s go do something,” suggested Darren. He looked at Stephanie for approval. “We didn’t just spend three hours in the car to come here and sit.”
I patted my leg and giggled, “How about some basketball?”
“How about let’s go to the mall,” he said as he handed me my crutches. “We’ll eat in the food court and then catch a movie.” He looked at Stephanie. “Remember, you wanted to see that new movie with Bradley Cooper.”
“Me?” laughed Stephanie. “You’re the one who is always talking about him.”
“He’s hot,” replied Darren. He added quickly, “But not as hot as Clayton.” My sister asked if I wanted to invite anyone else to go. I explained that Jeff was helping his father, and Tracy was probably still asleep.”
“Then it’s just the three of us,” replied Darren as he helped me from my seat. As we headed to the door, someone knocked. When Stephanie opened the door, Jimmy was standing outside.
“Hi, Jimmy,” my sister said as she opened the door wider for Jimmy to enter. “It’s been ages since I last saw you.” She scanned his body. “You’re a lot taller now.”
“Hi, Steph,” replied Jimmy. He glanced quickly at me. “I just stopped by to see how Jack is doing.” Stephanie explained to him that we were heading to the mall, and she asked if he wanted to join us.
“I don’t know,” replied Jimmy as he looked nervously at me. I think he was waiting to see my reaction before he accepted her offer. He smiled when I nodded my head. “Yeah, sure,” he said. “I’m in.”
On the way to the car she introduced Darren to Jimmy. She told him how Jimmy and I had been best friends since we were little. I was afraid she would say something about the accident, but she didn’t. And as far as I knew, Darren wasn’t aware that I was hit by the van because Jimmy was chasing me.
As we were driving to the mall, Stephanie turned and asked Jimmy if he was ready for basketball season to begin. She had gotten a chance to watch him play when he was a freshman. He sat on the bench most of the time, but he did get a few minutes later in the season.
He had been suspended ten days. However, he told me a couple of days ago that he had talked to his coach, and he told him as long as his grades didn’t suffer too much, he could be eligible to play. The coach told him he could practice, but he might not be able to play until his grades improved.
He shrugged his shoulders. “I guess,” he replied. “Football season just ended, so we’re just starting to practice.” He sighed and added, “It don’t look too good right now.”
My sister asked, “Why?”
He shrugged his shoulders again. “I don’t know,” he explained. “We just don’t seem to be getting things together. Maybe it’s because we got out of shape over the summer.”
“You’ll get better,” she assured him.
He looked at me and replied skeptically, “Maybe.”
Walking around the mall on crutches was difficult. I would go a little way, and then I’d have to stop to rest. Darren and Jimmy stayed beside me to catch me if I got too weak. A couple of times Jimmy held me tightly around the waist to steady me. One time when he did it, Darren looked over at me and raised an eyebrow. I think he was beginning to wonder if something was going on other than friendship.
We arrived at the Food Court around noon. Stephanie saw Mom and Karen sitting at a table and led us over to them. After embracing and explaining that she and Darren had come to visit me, we sat down. Jimmy took my crutches and helped me into the chair. I looked over at my mother and Stephanie. They were watching us intently.
I began to worry that perhaps Jimmy might be outing himself to them. He kept holding me tightly around the waist when I really didn’t need his support. I was afraid it looked like he might be hugging me. Then after I sat, he offered to get me whatever I wanted to order. After looking at my options, I told him I would like a chicken tender basket at one of the chicken restaurants. It surprised me when my mother opened her purse and handed him a ten. “Get what you want too, Jimmy,” she ordered. He and Darren headed off to get our food.
Stephanie and my mother chatted while they were gone. Most of the conversation was about her college classes. However, I noticed my mother look over at me, and then she would glance over at Jimmy and Darren as they stood in line to get our order.
When Jimmy and Darren returned, Jimmy placed my chicken tenders in front of me, and then he sat down and scooted his chair nearer to me. His action didn’t go unnoticed by my sister, Mother and Darren. Darren looked at me and again raised an eyebrow. I think he was beginning to assume that Jimmy and I were boyfriends.
After eating, my mother and Karen left to finish their shopping. When they left the area, Stephanie asked excitedly, “Are you guys boyfriends?” Darren nodded and agreed with her.
“What?” Jimmy stammered nervously as he glanced over at me. “Why are you asking us that?”
Darren laughed and responded, “If you guys get any closer, you’ll be getting naked and having sex right here on the table.”
Jimmy’s face whitened, and it looked like he wanted to jump up from the table and run away. I put my arm around his shoulder and told them to leave him alone. “We’re just friends, that’s all.” I knew Jimmy didn’t want to come out, so I was trying to protect him.
Darren laughed and said, “Yeah, okay. Sure.” He then leaned forward and said softly, “You guys better be careful. You’re going to blow your cover.”
It surprised me when Jimmy looked over at me and then told Darren, “You’re right. We better be careful.”
“Yes, well,” said Stephanie as she looked at her watch. “We should head over to the theater or we’re going to be late.” Jimmy reached down, gripped my arm and helped me to my feet. Again, he held me around the waist as we headed away.
We had entered the theater and was standing in line when my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller ID, and it was Jeff. “Where are you?” he asked. “I stopped by your house, but no one answered the door.” I explained to him that I was getting ready to see a movie with my sister. I didn’t mention that I was also with Darren and Jimmy.
“I’ll be there in a sec,” he said. “I’ll get Dad to bring me.” He hung up before I had a chance to tell him that Jimmy was with me. Jeff is insecure when it comes to Tracy and Jimmy. I was afraid he might make a scene when he arrives and sees Jimmy with me.
“Who was that?” asked Jimmy when I finished.
“Jeff,” I replied. “He wants to join us.”
Jimmy asked angrily, “Why?” I glanced quickly and Darren and Stephanie. They were listening to our exchange. To them, it probably sounded like Jimmy was the jealous boyfriend.
I told him that Jeff was supposed to come over and spend the afternoon with me, but since I was at the movie, he decided to join us. “That’s wonderful,” responded my sister. “I’ve never met Jeff. Mom has told me all about him.” I held my breath because I was afraid that she would ask me if Jeff was my boyfriend. However, she didn’t. Jimmy put his arm around me as we headed toward the theater where our movie would soon start.
Jimmy was making me uncomfortable. It seemed like he couldn’t keep his hands off me, and it was becoming obvious to everyone else. Stephanie and Darren quickly noticed, as did my mother. I know she was curious what was going on. Jimmy had stayed overnight at my house so often over the years, that Mom and Dad thought of him as a son. Now, she was looking at us differently. Now that she knows that I am gay, she will probably assume that every boy I talk to is also gay. I’m sure she’ll ask me if Jimmy is gay because of the way he acted today.
The coming attractions were showing when we sat down. Jimmy sat beside me and leaned toward me so that our shoulders were touching. Darren sat beside him. The show was getting ready to start in about five minutes when Jeff entered the theater, squinted his eyes and looked for us. I waved, and he smiled and approached. He squeezed past the others, and then he took a seat beside me. He leaned forward and said hi to everyone.
He frowned when he noticed Jimmy pressed into my shoulder. I thought Jimmy would sit straight in his seat, but he didn’t. It was as if he wanted Jeff to see him. I moved away and leaned toward Jeff. “What are you doing with him?” he whispered in my ear. Before I could answer, the lights dimmed, and the movie began.
Jeff reached over, grabbed my hand and squeezed it. “I missed you,” he whispered in my ear. It surprised me when he kissed my cheek. Jimmy saw him and muttered something, but I couldn’t understand what he said.
Fifteen minutes later, Jimmy leaned toward me and rested against my shoulder. A minute later, I froze when he placed his hand on my right thigh. I glanced quickly at Jeff, and he was looking at what Jimmy was doing. Jeff then placed his hand on my left thigh.
I sat frozen for several minutes while they caressed my thigh. It was as if they were in a battle to see who could arouse me more. I gasped when Jimmy moved his hand up my thigh and rubbed my erection. Jeff ran his hand up my thigh, pushed his hand away and gripped me tightly.
“Stop it!” I muttered softly as I batted both their hands away. “What do you think you’re doing? Both of you just stop!”
Jimmy removed his and sat up straight. Darren looked over our way. He was probably wondering what was going on. I don’t think he saw what was happening. I could hear Jeff sniffling, and then he rose and moved a seat away. I could tell by the light the movie was casting on his face that he was crying.
“Shit!” I mumbled. I rose and sat beside him. He leaned toward me until our shoulders were lightly touching. We sat the rest of the movie that way. We didn’t say anything, but I could tell that he was happy because he thought I had chosen him over Jimmy. If he had only looked into Jimmy’s face to see the angry looks he was giving both of us.
I was becoming really upset with Jimmy. He knew that Jeff and I wanted to be boyfriends. I had discussed it with him. Besides, just yesterday, he seemed to like Tracy. I now couldn’t understand why he was having a silent battle with Jeff for my attention. I liked Jimmy, but there was no way I wanted him to be my boyfriend.
The movie didn’t end soon enough. I couldn’t concentrate on what was happening on the screen because I was afraid that Jeff and Jimmy might get into a shouting match at any time. When the movie ended, I grabbed my crutches and hobbled out of the theater by myself. I think Darren sensed what was going on, and he put his arm around me and steadied me while I walked. When we got to his car, Jimmy told Jeff that there wasn’t any room for him in Darren’s small backseat, and that he would have to walk home.
“There’s room,” Darren insisted as he looked inside the car. “Jeff, you get in first. You’re small and can fit in the middle.” I looked over at Jimmy as he was muttering something to himself. Darren took my crutches and helped me in. Jimmy reluctantly climbed in beside Jeff as Darren put my crutches in the trunk.
The ride at first was tense. No one said anything. Then Jeff began squirming around and moaning that he was uncomfortable. “I’m sitting on the seatbelts,” he complained. Stephanie turned and told him it wouldn’t be long until we got home.
“Would you sit still,” hissed Jimmy after Jeff continued to shift in his seat.
“It’s hurting my ass,” complained Jeff. “I’m going to have butt marks.” Darren started laughing in the front seat.
He turned and said, “I know what you mean.” He looked at Stephanie. “I’ve gotten stuck in the middle when Clayton, Steph and I go out with friends.” Jeff smiled and nodded.
He then started shifting in his seat. “Sit still!” insisted Jimmy again. He then spread his legs and told Jeff to remove his seat belt and sit between his legs. I thought Jeff would refuse, but he unbuckled his seat belt and positioned himself between Jimmy’s legs.
“Better?” grumbled Jimmy as he looked over at me and frowned.
Jeff replied, “Much.” I held my breath because I wasn’t sure what would happen next. However, Jeff remained quiet as he looked out the window.
Stephanie and I talked for a few minutes about starting school on Monday. I was still reluctant to go back, but she tried to assure me that things would be okay. “You’ve got a lot of good friends who will be there to help you,” insisted Darren.
I thought that Jeff and Jimmy would agree, but neither said anything. When I looked at them, Jeff was pressed back against Jimmy, and Jimmy’s hand was resting on the front of Jeff’s pants. It was obvious that Jeff was hard, and Jimmy was feeling on him. When Jeff saw me staring, he shifted, grabbed Jimmy’s hand and removed it.
I couldn’t believe it. Jimmy was feeling on my boyfriend, and Jeff seemed to be enjoying it! Earlier, he had gotten mad because Jimmy had put his hand on my thigh. Now, he was doing much more. I clicked my tongue and stared out the window the rest of the way home. It was my turn to be jealous.