Dancing on a Star Chapter 18
“Relax, Jack,” Tracy assured me. “I’m holding you.” I looked down and saw a warm glow emanating from around my foot. “Stand on your toes,” said Tracy.
“I can’t,” I cried as I tried to balance myself. I looked past my foot and could see the earth shining below. I began to wobble, and Tracy put his arm around my waist to steady me. “You can do it,” he assured me as I attempted to balance myself on my toes.
“Now close your eyes,” he whispered softly. “Feel the warmth around you.” I closed my eyes as he had ordered, and I could feel a soft breeze on my cheeks. I could also hear a gentle humming in my ear. I felt at peace.
“It’s wonderful,” I remarked. Tracy moved away as I balanced myself on my toes.
“I know,” he replied. “This is where I come when the world becomes too much for me to handle.”
I said proudly, “I’m dancing on a star!” Suddenly, I began to wobble. I felt my foot slipping on the edge of the star.
“Tracy, I’m falling!” I shouted as I began to panic. I knew if I fell, it would be a long hard distance to earth.
“Jack!” shouted Tracy as my hand began to slip from his. I fell from the star, and I began a descent to earth.
“Tracy!” I shouted but his voice was beginning to fade away. My heart began to pound, and I feared that I was going to die.
Suddenly, someone wrapped their arms around me. “I’ve got you, Jack,” whispered Jeff as he kissed me gently. “You’ll be safe with me.” I felt that I was no longer falling. I opened my eyes as Jeff held my hand and we descended like eagles to the earth below.
I was awakened when a nurse came into the room around six to take my vitals. She seemed rushed, and except to ask me how I felt, she worked quickly and left. I needed to go to the bathroom, but I was afraid to ask her to help me because she seemed to be in a hurry.
Just before seven, Dr. Vorhees entered the room. He smiled when he noticed that I was awake. “How’s my favorite patient?” he asked cheerfully.
I jokingly stated, “I must be your only patient.”
“I wish,” he replied. He looked at his watch. “I have eleven more people on my rounds this morning.” He lifted the sheet and examined my leg. When he lifted it, I let out a soft whimper. “Did that hurt?”
“Just a little,” I replied.
“It’s supposed to hurt a little,” he informed me. “At least we know there’s no paralysis.”
“You mean I’m paralyzed?” I asked worriedly. He lifted my leg, and again I let out a sharp moan.
“Nope,” he smiled, “Not if you could feel that.”
I asked, “What about my other leg?” He pressed my foot, and I could feel the pressure. “I guess it’s okay,” I said with a sense of relief. He smiled and told me how lucky I was. After such an accident, many patients weren’t as fortunate.
He examined my head where I had hit the windshield, and he examined my eyes with a small flashlight. “Everything looks good,” he announced as he lifted my right arm.
“Are you righthanded?” he asked. When I told him I was, he joked that it would be a while before I could write again. “You’re going to have to learn to feed yourself with your left hand, too,” he added.
My face reddened when I informed him that I had to use the bathroom. “Pee or poop?” he asked.
“Pee,” I said.
“Good,” he laughed. “That’s the easy one.” He walked over to a counter, opened a door and took out a plastic object. He then walked over and handed it to me.
“What’s this?” I asked as I examined it.
He started to laugh. “It’s what you pee in.”
“I’m going to leave the room for a minute,” he responded. “Pull back your gown and line up your penis to the tube.”
I asked excitedly, “I gotta pee in this? Can’t you help me to the bathroom?”
“It’s too soon to be walking by yourself to the bathroom.” He pointed to the plastic urinal. “For now, it’s that.” He left the room laughing. “Good luck. Don’t spill it all over the bed.”
I couldn’t believe I had to pee in a plastic bottle. I opened my gown, lined my dick to the opening and let loose. It felt like I hadn’t peed in days. Before long, my pee was reaching the top. I panicked because I didn’t know what to do if it overflowed. I didn’t want to sit in a wet bed the rest of the day. Fortunately, I stopped before it reached the top.
A minute later, a nurse came into the room and took it from my hands. She went into the restroom and poured it into the toilet. I was too embarrassed to say anything to her before she left. “I’m never going to be a nurse,” I promised myself. Ten minutes later, Dr. Vorhees peeked in the room and asked if everything was okay? I told him it was, and he gave me a thumbs up and left.
A little after seven, an aide appeared at the door with a breakfast menu. She said since I couldn’t write, she would put down what I wanted for breakfast. After scanning the menu, I ordered bacon, scrambled eggs, toast and a glass of orange juice. She left and told me that the order would be ready in about twenty minutes.
I was trying unsuccessfully to eat with my left hand when my door opened. My father peeked inside. He then rushed into the room, leaned over and hugged me tightly. When I moaned, he stepped away. “Did I hurt you, Son?” he asked worriedly.
“No, Dad, I’m okay,” I assured him as I took my tray and placed it on the table beside the bed.” I looked behind him and asked, “Where’s Mom?”
He informed me, “She’s in the lobby talking to Dr. Vorhees.” Tears welled up in his eyes as he said, “I couldn’t wait. We’ve been sitting in the lobby for hours. I had to see that you were okay.” He leaned down and again hugged me, though much gentler than the first time.
He ran his hand over my head. “How do you feel, Jack? Are you hurting anywhere?” He lifted the sheet and looked at the cast on my left leg. “You gave me quite a scare last night.”
“So, you were with me?” I couldn’t remember if he had been at the scene of the accident, or if I had imagined it.
“Jimmy called me and told me you had been hurt,” he replied. Tears again welled up in his eyes. “When I got there, I thought you were dead.” He leaned down and hugged me as he continued to cry. I blinked away tears I felt forming in my eyes.
I asked, “Where’s Jimmy now?” If he hadn’t threatened me, I wouldn’t have run across the street and into the path of the van.
“I’m not sure,” he replied. “The police put him into the back of a patrol car. When his parents arrived, they took him down to the station. I called his father this morning, but no one answered the phone.”
I wasn’t sure how I felt about Jimmy. He’s the reason I’m lying in the hospital bed, but I could still hear him crying after I’d been hurt. I could also recall Tyler holding me with my head in his lap until the medics arrived.
I looked at the door when it opened. My mother entered and walked over to the bed. “How are you feeling?” she asked. She didn’t appear concerned at all. It was as if she had asked me that at the dinner table. I was lying in a hospital bed with casts on my arm and leg, and she didn’t appear to care.
She stepped closer to the bed and peered down angrily at me. “You know you wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t run away when I told you to come back last night.” My father grabbed her by the arm and forced her from the room. “We need to talk in the hall, Dear,” he insisted as he led her from the room.
I knew she would be upset with me, but I didn’t think she would be completely uncaring. Instead of acting concerned, she seemed more irritated by the fact I was in the hospital. I suppose she was afraid she would have to miss work because of it. A minute later, my father entered. My mother trailed behind with a frown on her face. She walked over and sat down in a chair without saying anything to me. My father stood by the bed and examined the cast on my leg. “Dr. Vorhees said it could be several months before you heal.” I looked over when my mother cleared her throat.
I jokingly replied, “I guess I won’t be playing any basketball for a while.”
Dad laughed and responded, “Well, it’s not like you did before this happened.”
“What?” I said. “Me, Tyler, Brian and Jimmy used to…” I stopped suddenly when I realized that they were no longer my friends. We had spent many hours playing ball in the driveway just weeks ago. Now that they knew I was gay, those days were gone.
“We’re going to have to do some rearranging of the house,” he suggested. “You won’t be climbing stairs for a while.” He turned to my mother. “We’ll put a single bed in the family room for him.” She frowned but said nothing.
I was becoming upset with her. She kept glaring at me. My father noticed and he positioned himself between us so I couldn’t see her. “Dad?” I asked.
“I have to pee.” I really didn’t, but I figured it might give my mother an excuse to leave. I’m sure she wouldn’t want to stay and watch me urinate into that plastic thing. I was right when she stood and announced she would be down the hall in the waiting room.
My father got the urinal from the restroom and handed it to me. “Do you need any help, Son?” he asked.
I laughed and said, “I think I can handle this.” When he continued to watch, I giggled and said, “Do you mind?”
“Jack,” he replied. “You might as well get used to me seeing you naked. You’re going to need me to help you bathe.” I gave him a funny look when he started laughing. “And God knows how you’re going to shit without my help.”
I smiled and said, “Have it your way.” I then pulled back my robe and began to piss. Dad watched a second before he stepped over to the window and looked out. I was embarrassed but there was little I could do. He probably hadn’t seen me naked since I was about seven, but I knew he was right. I was going to need his help to do many basic things for a few months. When I finished, he took the urinal and emptied it into the toilet.
“That was fun,” he laughed as he returned to the side of my bed.
I giggled and replied, “Wait until I have to take a shit.”
“God, Jack,” he laughed. “I’m going to ask the doctor to give you something to make you constipated.” We broke out into laughter.
The door opened and my mother entered and took a seat in the chair. Again, she said nothing to me. I could tell by the look on her face she was annoyed because she had to be sitting in a hospital room. Time seemed to drag on forever. We silently watched a movie on television. I dozed off several times. The medication I was on made me sleepy. Several times a nurse came in and took my vitals. Dad would try to talk to her, but my mother said nothing.
Around ten the door opened, and Jeff and his parents entered. Jeff was crying, and his father was holding onto him so he wouldn’t fall. When Jeff saw me, he broke from his father’s embrace and fell onto the bed.
“Jack!” he cried. “I was afraid you were dead!” When I winced in pain from his weight on me, my father pulled him away.
“Be careful, Jeff,” my father warned him. “Jack’s got some serious injuries. Jeff started sobbing into my father’s chest as he wrapped his arms around him.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Woolery,” apologized Jeff, “but I thought Jack was dead.” He continued to cry as his father and mother tried to comfort him. I looked over when my mother rose from her chair and left the room.
I held out my hand to Jeff. “I’m okay,” I assured him. He took my hand, leaned down and kissed me gently. “See,” I smiled. “I’m not dead.” He leaned forward and gently rested his head against my neck.
“God, Jack,” he cried. “I was so worried about you.” He stepped back and smiled down at me. I listened as my father explained my injuries to him and his parents. Jeff held my hand and teared up several times. I squeezed his hand tightly to let him know I was alright.
Jeff’s father explained, “We couldn’t get him to go to school today.” He reached out and put his hand around Jeff’s waist. “He had to come here to see that Jack was alright.”
“Well,” I said, “You can see that I’m okay.”
“No, you’re not,” he started to cry. “You’ve got a cast on your arm and leg. You’ve got a big knot on your head, and your dad said you have several broken ribs.”
I squeezed his hand tightly. “My doctor says I’ll be good as new in a few months.” I looked at my father and asked, “Didn’t he say that, Dad?” My father nodded his head. I giggled and told Jeff that he could come over after school and play nurse. His face turned a deep shade of red. I laughed because I knew what he was thinking.
My father had Mr. and Mrs. Munson sit, but Jeff refused to leave my bedside. He continued to hold my hand. I kept looking to see how my father would react, but he didn’t seem to be bothered by it. After a few minutes, he excused himself to go see where my mother went.
Jeff’s parents questioned me about the accident. They said that they had heard several different stories. Tracy had called Jeff, but he didn’t have much information. The entire time we talked, Jeff held my hand tightly. When I would look up at him, tears would appear in his eyes.
I sat up and asked them if they could leave the room for a few minutes. “I have to pee,” I explained. “I can’t get out of bed, and I have to pee in a plastic urinal.” They rose and started leaving the room. Jeff turned to follow them. “Wait, Jeff.” He turned and looked at me. He smiled when I asked him if he could stay.
I told him the urinal was in the bathroom. He got it and brought it to me. I placed it on the bed, and then I held out my arms to him. “Come here, Sexy,” I giggled. He smiled and leaned in to hold me. As he leaned forward, I kissed him. I thought it would just be a quick peck, but it turned into something more passionate. I could feel my dick start to harden.
I pulled away and laughed. “You better stop, or I’ll never be able to pee.” His eyes widened when I pulled up my gown. I was half erect. He reached for the urinal. “Let me since I’m going to be your nurse,” he insisted as he giggled. When he touched my cock, it expanded quickly.
“I can’t,” I laughed as he tugged to get it to align to the urinal opening. I stopped him when he started to jerk me off. “Oh, no you don’t,” I said. “You’re not going to get me turned on and then leave me laying here with a hard dick.”
“It’s already hard,” he giggled as he gave it a couple of quick jerks.
“We’d better stop,” I warned as I looked over at the door. The last thing I wanted was my mother coming in and finding Jeff’s hand wrapped around my erection.
“Okay,” he replied. “I’ll go out in the hall while you take care of business.” He turned and left the room. I looked over and watched the movie that was still on the television. Within a minute, my dick softened, and I was able to pee.
I started to doze off, but Jeff stuck his head into the room to see if I was finished. He grinned when I slowly opened my eyes. “Hey,” he smiled as he walked over to the bed.
“Here,” I said as I handed him the urinal.
“What am I supposed to do with his?”
I laughed and said, “Drink it.” His eyes widened as I laughed and told him to empty it in the toilet. When he finished, he returned to the side of my bed, gripped my hand and held it.
“We can’t keep doing this,” I insisted as I squeezed his hands.
He smiled and said, “But I love you, Jack.”
I sighed and replied, “We’ve talked about this, Jeff.”
“I know,” he responded as he leaned down and kissed me. When he pulled away, he said, “I didn’t know how much you meant to me until…” He started to cry. “Until I thought I was going to lose you.” He leaned forward and buried his head into my chest. When I let out a whimper, he pulled away and apologized.
He looked down and stated adamantly, “I mean it, Jack. I’m in love with you.”
I looked up into his serious face. “Come here,” I insisted. He leaned in and kissed me again. Just then, the door opened, and my father entered, followed by my mother.
“Jesus!” she hissed as she turned and left the room.
My father walked over and politely asked Jeff to leave. He squeezed my hand before he left. Once the door closed, my father let out a deep sigh.
“God, Jack,” he asked, “What is wrong with you?”
“What do you mean, Dad?”
“I’ve been working on your mother for days to accept what she saw between you and Tracy.” He shook his head. “And now, she sees you kissing Jeff. Can’t you keep your testosterone in check?”
I gave him a puzzled look and asked, “What’s that?”
He shook his head and said, “Never mind.” He warned, “You’ve got to be more careful, Jack.”
Tears welled up in my eyes, “I didn’t mean it to happen. It’s just…” I paused thinking what I wanted to say next.
“It’s just what?” my father asked.
“Don’t you kiss Mom to show her you like her?”
“But what, Dad?” I was becoming angry. “It’s okay because you and Mom are straight, but I can’t because I’m gay?”
My father shook his head and replied, “Jack, you just don’t understand.”
“What’s to understand?” I asked angrily. “I can’t kiss Jeff or Tracy because I like them?”
My father reached out and gripped my arm. “We need more time, Jack. This is something new.”
I understood what he meant. I had hidden my sexuality from them, and I was careful to conceal the fact that I was gay. Until Tracy moved in across the street, they never suspected anything. I had hidden so far into the closet, and I constantly feared what would happen if the door suddenly opened. Now, it had been opened, and I had to face the consequences.
I looked up and grinned. “Well, if you guys would learn to knock on a door, maybe you wouldn’t see something you didn’t want to.”
He shot back, “Maybe if you’d show a little more discretion.”
Tears filled my eyes, and I cried, “What am I going to do, Dad.”
“We’ll work it out,” he assured me as he leaned in and wrapped me in his arms.