“Shut up!” Matt yelled at Jessica Livingston.
“I don’t understand why you don’t just tell him,” insisted Jessica.
Matt met Jessica during his freshman year. He had wandered around campus for three weeks, never having really talked to anyone. Jessica approached him in the library, sitting down uninvited while Matt worked on a literature assignment.
They talked briefly, when suddenly Jessica came out and told Matt she found him attractive and invited him to dinner. He accepted. They went to dinner, and then back to her apartment for a late-night drink. After three gin and tonics, Matt became very relaxed.
As they sat on the sofa, Jessica became aggressive and began kissing Matt. They made out for a few minutes while she waited for him to make the next move. She had given him every indication that she was willing to offer him more, but he had apparently missed all the signals.
She sat up and looked at him and asked, “Are you gay?”
“Yes,” he admitted. He looked her briefly in the eyes and then stared at the empty television screen.
“Why did you come back with me then?” she asked. She didn’t appear angry. She would love to have had sex with Matt. What girl wouldn’t? He exuded sex with his hard body, soft blonde hair, and deep green eyes.
“I don’t know. I thought I might be able to do this just this once.” He blushed as he admitted his virginity with females to her.
He had experimented with several boys in high school. He had even had a steady boyfriend his junior year. That ended when the boy moved to another state.
He always wondered what it would be like to have sex with a girl. He wondered if it would be different than with a boy. He found Jessica to be extremely sexy, and he thought he might be able to perform with her; however, Little Matt didn’t cooperate.
“You were going to use me?” Jessica asked angrily.
“I’m sorry.” Matt covered his face with his hands and let out a loud sigh. “Guess I’d better leave now. I really am sorry.” He rose to his feet and prepared to rush out of Jessica’s apartment.
“No,” she said. “I’d like you to stay. Come to the kitchen and we’ll have a cup of coffee.” They talked for the next few hours. Matt told her his life history and his experimentation with boys. She listened intently, interrupting him several times to ask him some embarrassing questions.
Since that night four years ago, Matt and Jessica formed a very strong bond. She now had a steady boyfriend, and they were planning to marry after graduation. It didn’t stop her, though, from becoming Matt’s closest friend and confidante.
Jessica was with him when he went through his relationship in his sophomore year with his roommate, Jake. Things had been wonderful for months. He thought he was falling in love. Then one night he returned to his room early, only to find a boy down the hall in bed with Jake.
There was a huge scene, and Jake left the room that night. He never returned the following year. Matt heard through mutual friends that Jake had moved west and gotten involved in drugs.
He made the mistake last year of mentioning to Jessica his attraction to Joe. Since that time, she had made it her mission to get the two of them together. She wanted to see Matt find happiness. He had been lonely since his breakup with Jake. He never dated, and he was constantly busy with his newspaper assignments.
“I don’t know why you won’t be more open with him,” she said. “I’ve talked to people and they say that he and Marilyn are going through some rough times. This could be a good time to move in.”
She looked over and Matt and grinned. She knew Matt was weak when it came to Joe, but he would never get up the nerve to make the first move. He had been waiting patiently for three years for Joe to show interest in him, but he never did.
“You’re going to lose out. We graduate in five months, and you may never see him again,” she warned. “What if you could have had him and missed the opportunity?”
She was beginning to make sense. "What if I tell him how I feel and he hits me?”
“You know he wouldn’t do that. Joe is a good guy, and you know it,” Jessica countered.
It was true. Joe was a good guy. In three years, he had never heard him say anything bad about anyone. There had been interviews over the years with some real sleaze balls, but Joe never said anything bad about them. However, nothing had ever come up about the gay lifestyle.
“What have you got to lose?” Jessica asked. “If you won’t do it, I will.”
“Don't you dare!” shouted Matt.
“Watch me,” Jessica replied with an evil smirk. Matt knew that smirk. He had seen it many times over the years. It was on her face the time she told him that she was going to get her current boyfriend to have sex after several weeks of a platonic relationship.
She walked into the coffee shop the next morning with that same smirk on her face saying, “See I told you I would do it.” She then told Matt about a night of hot, passionate sex with Brian, now her fiancé.
“Next time take pictures,” Matt replied after her erotic story. “Just edit yourself from them.” She kicked him under the table, and they enjoyed a rousing laugh.
“You still need to talk to him,” she said. “What have you got to lose?”
“I’ll think about it,” he responded. He had already made his decision, though. He didn’t tell Jessica because she would be disappointed.
* * * * * * * *
The next afternoon Matt and Joe met in the journalism room to discuss Joe’s ideas for a spin-off of the Wellston story. They discussed the dozen students who had were found engaging in various forms of sex in two upstairs bedrooms.
Joe asked, “Do you still have your notes from the party?”
“Yeah, hold on. Let me get them.” Matt dug out two spiral notebooks. Because of his thorough investigative nature, he had kept detailed notes concerning the incident. He had interviewed about forty people who had been present at the party. Most had been unwilling to talk to him. Several had agreed; so he had a general idea of who was involved and the types of activity they engaged in.
The police also furnished him with the police arrest records, which went into some detail on the activities. Most of the students involved were students at the college. Fourteen students had been arrested for various misdemeanors, mostly public indecency, public intoxication and possession of controlled substances.
Samuel J. Wellston was charged with twenty-six drug charges, mostly for distribution of controlled substances. Cocaine, marijuana and Ecstasy were found in his home. He was also charged with six counts of corruption of a minor. All of the charges centered on his involvement with drugs and alcohol. However, in his notes, Matt had witnesses who said that sex was also involved. The police never took that information to the prosecutor.
Wellston was found guilty of four felonies: two for distribution of drugs, one for possession of a controlled substance and one for corruption of a minor. He agreed to a plea bargain. In doing so, many of the original charges were dropped. He was sentenced by a judge to six years in a federal penitentiary.
“I want to focus on the sex involved at the party,” Joe informed Matt.
Matt liked the sound of it. He had wondered why nothing ever came of the sexual activity at the party. Numerous students had been found in upstairs bedrooms engaged in sex. According to two people who did give him information, four of them were underage high school students- all boys. One of the boys was believed to have been a freshman at the nearby public high school. The others were believed to be older, perhaps juniors or seniors.
What Matt found interesting was the fact that the boys had not been engaged in sex with girls. They had been with male college students. No charges were ever filed regarding their activity. He always wondered why.
“According to your notes, there was a lot of sex going on when the police raided the place,” Joe said to Matt as he scanned his notes.
“Yeah, according to people I talked to, the place was like a Roman orgy. People were getting high on coke and X. They were screwing anything that walked,” laughed Matt.
“How did we miss that party? No one told us about it. I would have had a great time.” Joe responded with laughter.
“Man, you’re a dirty dog! I didn’t know you were into kinky sex,” Matt laughed. He looked over at Joe to see how he reacted to that comment. Maybe Joe wasn’t the clean-cut guy he tried to portray.
“Well, you never know,” he stated, wiggling his eyebrows. “If you can’t be with the one you love, then love the one you’re with.”
“Oh, really?” Matt raised an inquisitive eyebrow.
“I’m just playing with you,” responded Joe when he saw the look on Matt’s face.
Matt was disappointed. For a moment he thought that maybe Joe didn’t live up to his puritan image. If he got high, maybe he would jump into bed with anyone.
“Let’s see what you got.” Joe scooted his chair closer and leaned into Matt to read his notes. Their legs began to touch.
Matt was confused. Why was Joe getting so close? He could have just asked for the notes and read them where he was sitting. Instead, he was now pressed against him, occasionally letting their legs touch.
“God! He smells good,” thought Joe. He was becoming intoxicated with the sweet scent emanating from Matt’s cologne. He wasn’t sure why he did it, but he had moved closer to his friend and had even pressed up against him.
“What’s this?” Joe asked. “What does it say here about four boys? I can’t read your handwriting.” As he spoke, he began to gently rub his leg against Matt. Nothing was very overt, just a subtle little pressure.
“Oh, yeah,” Matt replied. “That’s the strangest thing about this investigation. They found four high school boys naked in bed, but nothing further was said about it. It’s like the investigation just stopped.”
He felt Joe’s leg against him, and he was breathing more rapidly. Beads of sweat were beginning to form on his brow. He couldn’t believe that the man he had fantasized about for the past three years was now sitting so close to him. He could feel the pressure on his leg as Joe continued to lightly rub their legs together.
The friction of their legs rubbing together was having a very arousing effect on him. His most pressing problem was how he was going to adjust himself without Joe noticing.
“Wow!” Joe said excitedly. “It says here they were engaged in sex with college students. Male college students!” He reached down and quickly adjusted himself.
Matt’s eyes caught this movement. “Wow!” he thought excitedly. He saw Joe discreetly try to adjust himself.
Matt was becoming extremely frustrated. He couldn’t contain his feelings. The man he had wanted for so long, but seemed so unattainable, was getting excited right before his eyes. He hesitated a moment, then reached down and adjusted himself better.
Matt’s action did not go unnoticed by Joe. He looked down and watched as Matt rearranged himself. “Blondie’s getting excited!” He thought to himself. His mind was beginning to spin.
“What’s this say here?” He reached over and put his shoulder against Matt as he pointed out scribbling on the page. In doing so, he pushed his leg harder into him and began to rub more forcefully. It seemed like there was no turning back now. He had entered a world that before had been unknown to him Never had he felt the need to feel another man. His hand began to shake as he pointed out the place on the page. He could feel his body getting warm, and he was beginning to break out in a sweat.
Throwing all caution to the wind, Matt placed his hand on Joe’s leg as he looked at the paper. Joe’s body stiffened when he began to gently rub his leg.
“Look, man. I gotta go.” Joe said excitedly. He looked at his watch. “I’ve got a meeting in ten minutes at the administration office.” Joe suddenly seemed extremely upset. He was hurriedly gathering his papers and books. He was breathing heavily, and sweat was appearing on his face.
“Listen, we’ll get together tomorrow.” He quickly said; and then just as quickly, he disappeared out the door.”
'What was that all about?' Thought a very confused Matt as he stared at the empty doorway.