Losing Kevin

Chapter 12

Cameron smiled when he opened the door to see Kevin standing outside. “Come in.” He moved aside as Kevin brushed past him. “Mom is in the kitchen.”

“Hello, Dear.” Mrs. Lynch walked up to Kevin and embraced him. “How are you this afternoon?” She set a glass of milk and cookies on the table. “Sit down, Boys.”

They ate the cookies and stared across the table at each other. Cameron would blush occasionally and look down. When they were finished, he invited Kevin to his room.

“What did you want to see me about?” he asked as he closed the door. Kevin walked over and hugged him.

“I’m worried,” he said. “After what happened to me last night, I’m afraid someone is going to hurt you. Then you said Paul was going to hit you in the restroom.” He hugged him tighter. “I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Cameron held him tightly and enjoyed the closeness. He put his head on Kevin’s chest and could hear his heart beating softly.

Kevin leaned back and looked deeply into Cameron’s eyes. “I love you,” he whispered. Cameron rose on his toes and kissed him.

“I love you, too, Kevin,” he replied. He gave him a sad look. “I wish Mom wasn’t home.”


He reached down and rubbed his hand across Kevin’s erect cock. “I want you,” he replied. They continued kissing for several more minutes. Finally, Kevin stepped away and started pacing around the room.

“We’ve got to be careful, Cameron,” he said worriedly. “I know Paul and Gordon are out to get us. It’s hard to say how many more guys there are.”

“But what about Devin?” Cameron walked over and faced him. “He didn’t act like he wanted Paul to hurt me. He even hit him in the stomach.”

Kevin gave him a puzzled look. “I can’t figure that out, either. At home he’s acting normal one minute, then the next minute he’s calling me a fag. I wish I knew what was going on inside his head.”

“I always thought identical twins could read each other’s minds.”

“That’s not always true,” Kevin replied. “We used to when we were little, but the older we got, it seemed like we tried to stop doing it. I guess I was afraid he’d realize one day I was gay.”

“He knows you’re gay, now,” stated Cameron. “Don’t you have some idea how he feels about it?”

“Yeah,” Kevin said sadly. “He hates me.” He walked over to an easel in the corner and lifted the thin sheet draped over it.”

“Don’t!” Cameron hollered out, but it was too late. Kevin had already revealed what was underneath it.

“Wow!” Kevin said admiringly. “When did you paint this?”

Kevin was staring at the painting Cameron had started the day he returned from the fishing trip. It was a picture of Kevin as he stood looking out over the crystal lake with the sun hitting the side of his face. The intense colors seemed to jump off the painting.

“This is beautiful!” Kevin walked around the picture admiring its beauty. “Is this really me?”

Cameron looked at the picture and then back at the admiring face before him. “Yeah,” he said shyly. “It’s you.” He walked over and threw his arm around Kevin. They held each other as they looked at the picture.

“I’ve never seen anything more beautiful,” commented Kevin admiringly. “The way the sun is shining over the lake is gorgeous.”

Cameron giggled. “That’s not what I find beautiful.” He looked into Kevin’s eyes and kissed him again. Kevin almost lost his balance when Cameron pushed him back onto the edge of the bed. He then walked over to the door and locked it.

“What are you doing?” Kevin asked when Cameron returned. Cameron lay down beside him and started rubbing his cock through his jeans.

“Don’t say anything,” he said softly, “Please?” He then unbuttoned his pants. Kevin lay back and closed his eyes. He lifted his body when Cameron tried to pull down his pants. Seconds later, he was completely exposed.

“Mmmm,” he moaned, when Cameron started stroking his hard cock. He looked down when he felt a warmth encircle his cock. Cameron had taken about half his erection into his mouth and was gently sucking him.

“Oh, God!” he moaned quietly as he laid back and reveled in the intense feeling he was feeling. Cameron was doing a good job for his first time. He reached down and gently held back of Cameron’s head as he bobbed up and down on his cock.

“Oh, God!” he moaned again after several minutes. “I’m going to cum!” He grabbed Cameron’s head and tried to pull him off, but Cameron resisted. Kevin threw his head back just as he felt the first volley shoot into Cameron’s mouth. He heard him gag slightly, but then he continued to suck him. “Unggg!” Kevin cried out softly as he continued to fill Cameron’s mouth with his warm cum.

Cameron jumped off the bed and went across the hall to the bathroom. He reappeared with a towel and wiped Kevin’s cock clean. Kevin leaned up on his elbows and smiled as he watched Cameron gently clean him.

“That was great.” Cameron was looking at him and beaming.

“Did it feel good?” he asked. “I really wanted your first time to be good.” Kevin leaned down and pulled him into a hug.

“It was the best,” he said as he kissed him passionately. He could still taste the slight remains of his cum on Cameron’s lips. He looked at him and grinned. “I can’t believe you let me cum in your mouth.”

“You let me the other day,” Cameron smiled back. “I wanted you to feel as good as you made me feel.”

“Well, you did,” Kevin replied as he kissed him once again.

“Boys!” Mrs. Lynch hollered out. “Dinner’s ready!”

Cameron grinned and rubbed his stomach. “I’m not hungry,” he giggled. “I’ve already eaten.” Kevin laughed and then kissed him again before they headed down to the kitchen.


Devin was walking to class when he saw Ashley walking with Sherri. He approached her from behind, grabbed her arm and turned her towards him.

“What the hell?” She blurted out before realizing it was Devin. A disappointed look appeared on her face.

“We have to talk,” insisted Devin. He gave Sherri an angry look. “Alone.”

Sherri took Ashley’s arm and started to lead her away as Devin held her other. Ashley turned to Sherri and said, “You go ahead. I’ll talk to you later.” Sherri gave Devin an angry look before storming off down the hall.

Ashley looked angrily at Devin. “What do you want?”

“I want you to stop having people hurt my brother,” he insisted angrily. “Paul told me you told him to mess with Kevin.” He squeezed her arm tighter. “Got it?”

Ashley pulled her arm away and then turned to head off down the hall. Devin pulled her back. “Is that all you think about?” she muttered angrily. “It’s always about Kevin.”

“I just don’t want to see him hurt,” replied Devin. “He’s my brother.”

“And I thought I was your girlfriend,” responded Ashley angrily. “Why don’t you go suck your brother’s dick.” She turned and walked away. Devin ran up and grabbed her, turning her towards him. His face was flushed with anger.

“You Bitch!” he hissed.

Ashley shouted, “I wasn’t a bitch when you were fucking me!” Devin looked around the hall to see everyone watching their exchange. Ashley covered her face and started crying.

Devin squeezed her arm tighter. “What is wrong with you?” She looked up at him tearfully.

“I’m pregnant, you fucker!” shouted Ashley. Several girls standing nearby gasped. Devin pulled Ashley’s arm and started to lead her away. “You told me I wouldn’t get pregnant,” she cried as they passed another group of students. Devin’s face was red with embarrassment as they walked down the hallway.

She continued to cry as he led her through an exit door and out into the cold outside air. He pulled her against the building and tried to shield them from a cool breeze.

He asked, “What are you going to do?” She looked up angrily at him.

“What the fuck do you mean, what am I going to do?” she shouted. “This is your baby too.”

“I can’t be a father!” he shouted. “I’m only sixteen!”

“Do you think I want to be a mother?” Ashley shouted back. “I’m also sixteen, just in case you forgot.” She began to slide down the wall, but Devin pulled her back to her feet.

“You got to get rid of it,” he responded urgently. “I’ve got some money saved up. I’ll help you get an abortion.”

“I’m not getting rid of IT!” Ashley cried. “The church says I’ll go to hell if I have an abortion.”

“Well, you can’t have it!” Devin shouted back. “It’s half mine, and I say you have to get rid of it.”

Ashley raised her hand and slapped Devin across the cheek. “You Fucker!” she cried. “It is a baby, and I’m going to have it. Whether you want to admit it or not, you’re going to be a father.”

Devin fell against the wall and let his body slide downward. He sat on the cold ground and buried his hands in his head. “Dad is going to kill me when he finds out.”

Ashley stood over him and said, “You should have thought about that when you were fucking me without a rubber.”

“I know,” he muttered sadly. He stood back up and grabbed Ashley’s shoulders. “Listen, Ash. We are only sixteen. We can’t have a baby. It’s going to ruin both our lives.”

Ashley started crying again. “We should have thought about that earlier. Now it’s too late.”

“No it’s not, Ashley,” pleaded Devin. “You’ve got to get rid of it without anyone finding out.” He realized, though, that it was impossible to do it secretly. By now, most of the school probably knew Ashley was pregnant. He resented her for telling him she was pregnant in the school hallway. If she had done it when they were alone, then they could have kept it a secret.

Ashley grabbed her stomach and rubbed it gently. “I’m keeping this baby, Devin. It’s mine, and I won’t kill it.” She gave him one last sad look and then started walking away.

“It’s mine, too!” he shouted out as she walked into the building. His body slid once more to the ground. He buried his head in his hands and moaned, “I’m too young to be a father.” He rose to his feet and headed away from the school. He didn’t feel like going back in and listening to the gossip that would be swirling around the rest of the day.


When Kevin sat down at the lunch table with Cameron, Stanley and Charles, he immediately looked across the cafeteria to where his brother usually sat. The table was empty. He found it strange that neither Ashley nor Paul were sitting there.

Stranger still was all the weird looks that he had been getting all morning from other students. It wasn’t the kind of looks he had received when they found out he was gay. Instead, it was a secretive look and an occasional giggle.

When he glanced over, he noticed the worried look on Cameron’s face. Stanley and Charles had similar looks. “Would someone tell me what’s going on?” He asked as he sat down with his lunch tray. “Do I have a big wart on my face or something? I feel like everyone knows something except me.”

Stanley asked, “You haven’t heard then?” He looked worriedly over at Cameron.

“Heard what?” Kevin asked impatiently. He looked pleadingly at Cameron for an answer.

He grew uneasy when as Cameron looked sadly at him. Finally, he told him, “Ashley’s pregnant.”

“What!” he shouted. “Pregnant? How?”

Charles giggled and said, “We may be gay, but even we know how girls get pregnant.” He coiled back embarrassedly when Stanley shot him an angry look. “Sorry,” he apologized as he looked over at a still stunned Kevin.

“She told Devin in the hallway in front of everyone,” Stanley informed him. “The whole schools knows. It’s all anyone is talking about.”

“Damn,” Kevin hissed as tears filled his eyes. “Where’s Devin now?” He started to get up and find his brother, but Cameron grabbed his arm and pulled him back to his seat.

“No one knows,” he replied. “He hasn’t been seen all morning. He probably left school.” Just then, Ashley walked in with several girls surrounding her. They were holding her as she walked over and took her usual seat. Sherri looked over and scowled.

“What’s her fucking problem?” Charles asked angrily. “You didn’t get Ashley pregnant.”

Cameron reached down, took Kevin’s hand and held it under the table. He looked worriedly over at Kevin. “Are you going to be all right?”

Kevin’s eyes were still filled with tears as he looked over and forced a smile. “I think so. I’m worried about Devin, though. Dad’s going to kill him when he finds out about this.”

Cameron tried to comfort him as he rubbed his knuckles gently. “He didn’t get mad when he found out you were gay,” he reminded him. “You thought he would be mad about that and he wasn’t.”

Kevin responded, “I couldn’t help being gay. He could accept that. But Devin should have known better. He didn’t have to get Ashley pregnant.” He looked across the cafeteria and watched as the girls tried to comfort a crying Ashley. She briefly looked over, but then turned her head away. “Dad will kill him.”

“Not if Mr. Vance kills him first,” commented Charles. “He’ll castrate Devin when he finds out.” Stanley hit him on the arm. “Well, it’s true,” insisted Charles. “You’ve seen him at the games. He’s a mean son of a bitch.” Again, Stanley hit his arm harder.

Kevin rose from his seat. Cameron tried to stop him, but he pulled away. “Where are you going?” Cameron asked worriedly.

“I have to find Devin,” he responded sadly. “He needs me right now.”

Cameron rose and tried to hold him. “Kevin, he wasn’t there when you needed him. Why do you care?”

Tears appeared in his eyes when he turned and faced Cameron. “Because I’m not Devin,” he replied. “I love my brother.” He pulled his arm away from Cameron and walked quickly across the cafeteria. Cameron tried to catch up with him as he exited the building through a side door.


“What is wrong with you, Guys?” Coach Alston was clapping his hands as he attempted to get his players motivated. Their first game was Friday, and their performance at practice was troubling him. He also wondered where Kevin was. It was the first practice he had missed.

Alston blew his whistle and motioned for his players to gather around him in the middle of the court. “If you guys play like this Friday, we’re going to start our season 0-1.” He looked into the faces of the boys assembled around him. After years of coaching, he could tell when something serious had happened.

“All right, Guys.” He knew that it was senseless to continue practice when the boys’ hearts weren’t in it. “Go hit the showers.” He looked over at Stanley and Charles and pointed toward his office. They nodded their heads and trailed behind him.

They sat in chairs while he walked over and sat on his desk. He waited for them to say something, but when they didn’t he asked, “What’s wrong? Does it have something to do with Kevin’s absence from practice?”

Stanley looked sadly at him. “Yes, Coach,” he replied. “Devin walked out of school and no one knows where he is. Kevin and Cameron are out searching for him. I keep calling them, but so far they haven’t found him.”

“Has he run away?” Coach asked worriedly. Charles nodded his head. “But why?”

“You haven’t heard?” Alston gave Stanley a puzzled look and then shook his head.

“He got his girl friend pregnant,” Stanley informed him. “It’s all over school.”

Alston shook his head sadly. He looked at the young men before him. Besides coaching basketball, he also taught a health class. One of the lessons he taught early in the year focused on teenage sex. He lectured on abstinence; but being realistic, he knew students would often succumb to peer pressure. He spent several class periods discussing safe sex and sexually transmitted diseases. He always hoped that he could save one girl from an unwanted pregnancy or a young man from acquiring HIV. It saddened him when his warnings went unheeded.

“Does Ashley’s father know yet?” He was concerned about Devin’s safety. Mr. Vance was a construction worker and a very large man. Even though he didn’t have any children participating in sports, he was still an avid fan and attended many football and basketball games. Anyone who ever sat beside him also knew that he had an explosive temper. He could often be heard yelling insults and taunting the opposing team. Last year, he was removed from a basketball game when he threatened the coach of an opposing team.

“If he doesn’t by now,” replied Charles, “he will soon. I’m sure some teacher will call Ashley’s mother with concerns about the rumors going around school. There’s no way he won’t find out.”

“He’ll certainly know in a few months,” said Stanley. “Maybe by then, Devin could have made it to Mexico. Her father will kill him when he finds out she’s pregnant.”

Alston looked down and shook his head at the two sad figures before him. Even though Devin had recently ended their life-long friendship, they still were concerned for him. It never ceased to amaze him how students could put aside differences when a friend was in trouble.

“Why don’t you boys go hit the showers,” suggested Alston. They stood and started to leave the room. “Keep me informed,” he hollered out. The boys turned and nodded their heads. “I have Kevin’s cell phone number. I’ll give him a call later and see if he’s been able to find Devin.” They again nodded their heads again as they headed out the door.


Kevin and Cameron walked for hours looking for Devin. They went to all the places that Kevin thought he might be able to find him. They spent an hour at the mall searching the arcade and sporting shops. They had to leave when a security guard questioned them why they were there during school hours. He escorted them to an exit and then threatened that if he saw them there again when school was in session, he’d call their parents.

“Like Dad would care,” remarked Kevin as he and Cameron walked away. “It would sure be better news than the one he’s gotten.”

Cameron gave him a puzzled look. “How do you know he knows?” Kevin reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He opened it and looked at the small screen.

“Oh, he knows,” he replied sadly. “My phone has been vibrating all afternoon.” He looked again at the screen. “He’s texted me six times.” He opened up one of the messages and held the phone up for Cameron to read.


“Where do you think he is?” They sat down on a bench as Cameron looked worriedly at Kevin.

“I don’t know,” sighed Kevin. “We’ve been everywhere I thought he might be. I’ve called all his friends. Even Paul doesn’t know where he is. I’m starting to get worried.”

“You don’t think he’d do anything, would he?” Cameron watched as tears appeared in Kevin’s eyes.

“I don’t think so,” he replied. “It wouldn’t be like him. But this is pretty serious. I don’t think he knows how to face Dad and Mom. We’re only sixteen, and he’s going to be a father.”

“So where are we going next?” Cameron asked. “Any more ideas where he might be?”

“Why don’t you go on home?” Kevin suggested. “You’ve been with me all day. I’m sure your mom wants you home. I’ll just walk around for a little while longer and then go home and face Dad.”

Cameron looked down at his watch. “I did tell Uncle Jerry I would come by his house. Uncle Dave bought me some more paints. Now I can finish that painting I did of you at the lake.”

“I love that painting,” Kevin said as looked around. He then reached down and took Cameron’s hand and squeezed it.

“Can I have it when you get done?” Cameron started frowning. “What?”

“You just ruined my birthday surprise.” Kevin looked around to see if anyone was watching, and then he leaned in and gave Cameron a quick kiss on his cheek.

“I love you, you know that, huh?” He gently squeezed Cameron’s hand.

“I’ve kind of figured that out,” giggled Cameron. He leaned in and gave Kevin a quick kiss. They stood still holding hands. “I guess I better go.”

“I’ll walk you home,” volunteered Kevin.

“No,” insisted Cameron. “I’ll take a bus to Uncle Jerry’s. You go do what you have to do. I’ll call you later. Good luck.” He smiled sadly at Kevin and then walked away. Kevin sighed and headed down the sidewalk in search of his missing brother.


Devin opened his cell phone and read the latest text message from his father:


He knew his parents were aware of Ashley’s pregnancy. After her behavior in the hallway earlier, he was sure that they would find out sooner than he had hoped. He also knew that if they knew, then so did Ashley’s parents.

He recalled a conversation had with Mr. Vance a few months earlier. He had been invited to stay for dinner. After dinner, as Ashley and her mother were in the kitchen, her father had made an attempt to make a joke. At the time, though, Devin knew that he was serious.

“I hope you are respecting my daughter, Boy,” he commented as he leaned in menacingly toward him. He picked up a steak knife and ran his finger against the blade. “Because if I ever find out you aren’t.” He made a stabbing motion toward Devin. Devin jumped and almost fell out of his chair. Mr. Vance leaned back and roared with laughter. “Had you going, didn’t I, Boy?”

Devin had quickly left the table and headed into the kitchen to be with Ashley. Several times since the incident, he wondered if Mr. Vance would ever really hurt him. Now he was certain that he would.

After leaving school, he went to the one place he knew no one would look for him- the public library. Sitting at a computer, he googled ‘teenage father.’ He spent the afternoon reading stories about other boys who had faced the same situation he was in. Many felt like him, that abortion was the best solution. However, the majority of their girlfriends had decided to keep the baby. Most were working part time jobs after school to support the baby.

A couple of guys had readily accepted the fact that they were fathers, and they were doing everything they could to see that the child’s needs were provided. They had the support of their families in raising the child until they graduated from high school and could take care of it themselves.

He thought of his family situation. He knew his parents would never accept him getting Ashley pregnant. His father had lectured him several times on keeping his ‘testosterone in check.’ He even warned him one time when he thought that he and Ashley were getting too serious, that he ‘better not make him a grandpa.’ He smiled when he said it, but there was a threat behind his words.

To make matters even worse, he had fallen out recently with his father over Kevin. Since slapping him, they hadn’t said more than a dozen words to each other. His mother was trying to get them to talk, but her efforts had been futile. He was now beginning to realize that he had handled Kevin being gay wrong. He should have been more understanding. Instead, he selfishly considered his own image and how others would perceive him having a gay brother. He had even engaged in sex with Ashley to prove that he himself was not gay. He walked proudly down the hall with Ashley at his side, knowing that others didn’t think he was gay like his brother.

Now he knew he had made a big mistake- a mistake that would cost him for the rest of his life.

He put his head down on the table and sighed. An elderly gentleman sitting beside him asked if he was all right. “Yeah,” he sighed. He sat up and googled a name into the white pages. Seconds later, an address appeared: Jerry Alston 1876 Mapleside Drive

He got up and put on his coat. He was going to go see the only person he thought he could trust. He only hoped that Coach Alston could forgive him.