Jason picked me up to go to the party around a quarter to eight. I had wanted to drive my own car, but he insisted on me riding with him. He thought it would be nice if all four of us rode together. Since he had been our main source of transportation over the past year, I didn’t refuse. I think he was also a little jealous that I had a nicer car than he had.
After we left my house, we drove to Cynthia’s. As a rule, I always had to go in and greet her father before taking her anywhere. I lied and told him it was a chaperoned party we were attending. As far as Cynthia knew, I was telling the truth. I don’t think anyone mentioned to her that Chris’s parents would be gone for the evening.
I sat in the backseat with Cynthia while we went to pick up Stephanie. Jason blew the horn twice, and she came running outside to the car. She spoke to Cynthia when she got in, but she ignored me.
We arrived at Chris’s house in about ten minutes. His home was enormous. It sat on a hill with a long driveway. His father was a land developer, and he had built most of the newer homes in the area. He and my father were the best of friends, so he hired my father’s firm to do most of the plumbing.
Chris greeted us at the door. He was dressed in khaki shorts and a light blue polo shirt. He looked really cute. I hadn’t paid much attention to his looks before; but standing in the doorway with the fading sunlight on his face, he drew my attention. The thing I noticed most was his twinkling green eyes.
Chris is about 5’9” and weighs about145 pounds. He has short brown hair that is tapered on the sides and spiked on top. He is tanned, probably from swimming in the backyard pool.
He is extremely quiet in school. I was surprised when he agreed to volunteer for the mock trial. To most people, he seems aloof and somewhat arrogant. However, after working with him for the past month, I knew he was just shy.
He smiled when we walked up onto the front porch. “Welcome to Sunnyvale Manor,” he announced as he waved a drink in front of him. “The home of the great John Vandale Brewster.” He stumbled, as he stepped back to let us in. Jason looked over at me and laughed.
“I guess he started without us,” he exclaimed. “Show us the way to the liquor cabinet, Old Boy.” He grabbed an unsteady Chris and led him back into the house.
I didn’t like the way things were going. I figured we would probably do a little drinking, but Chris and Jason seemed to have different plans. I knew I was right when Jason came back into the living room a few minutes later and handed me a tall glass.
“What’s this?” I asked.
“Rum and coke,” he said. He took a drink from his glass. “Drink up, Tay.”
“You’d better go slow with that,” whispered Cynthia. “He may need some help getting out of here later.”
“I’m not planning on getting drunk,” I assured her. She got up and returned a few minutes later with a drink.
“What do you have?” I asked.
“Lemonade,” she giggled. “Daddy would kill me if I came home with alcohol on my breath.”
“Kill you,” I laughed. “He’d cut my balls off. I told him we were being chaperoned.”
Cynthia suddenly realized that no adults were around. “Where are his parents?”
“Out for the night,” I laughed. She looked over and gave me a worried look.
“It will be all right,” I said smilingly. “Trust me.”
Chris turned on some music and we got up and started dancing. I have to admit I was having fun. It felt good to ‘let loose.’ The alcohol was letting down my inhibitions. Every time I would put down my drink, either Jason or Chris would refill it.
Jason tried to get me and Stephanie to dance, but she refused. I guess she hadn’t had enough to drink. Jason gave her one when we first entered, but she only sipped slowly on it. I suppose she was afraid Jason might get drunk, and she wanted to keep a watchful eye on him.
Most of the songs we danced to were fast, but at one point Chris walked, turned down the lights and played a slow song. I danced with Cynthia while watching Jason grinding sexually into Stephanie’s body. I felt sorry for Chris. He sadly watched while we danced. I thought it was strange that he had not invited a girl to join him at the party. With his good looks- and his father’s money, he could have had his pick of any girl at school.
“Why don’t you go dance with Chris?” I whispered into Cynthia’s ear. She looked over and saw him sitting at the bar watching us dance. “I feel sorry for him. We’ve been dancing for an hour and he hasn’t danced one time.”
Cynthia walked over, grabbed his hand and pulled him out onto the middle of the floor. He kept trying to pull away, but Jason and I kept pushing him back into Cynthia’s arms. Finally, he stopped resisting and fell against her.
Jason and Stephanie started applauding as he held onto Cynthia. It looked like she was struggling to keep him on his feet. When Jason and Stephanie started dancing, I noticed that Jason could hardly stand also. I reeled back and sat on a barstool. I watched Cynthia and Chris slowly dance. He kept his eyes closed, but he would occasionally open them and look sadly at me when they circled my way. Once when they went around, it looked like he might have tears in his eyes.
The song ended and Chris walked over and put a fast dance song on. Cynthia took a seat on the barstool. I was standing beside her when Chris approached.
“How about a fast dance?” Chris asked her timidly.
“I’m tired,” Cynthia said exhaustedly. “Can you wait a little while?”
Chris’s face dropped and he started to walk off. I walked over and grabbed his arm. “I’ll dance with you,” I said. He looked bashfully around the room. “Come on. It’s just us here. No one gives a damn.”
We went to the middle of the room and started dancing. I don’t think I had ever seen Chris so animated. He was stumbling around the room, throwing his arms in the air and singing loudly to the song.
“Look at the two fags,” I heard Stephanie say angrily to Jason.
“Shut up, Steph,” he told her. “They’re just having fun.”
“Well then,” she pushed Jason away, “you go dance with them.”
“I will.” He walked over and started dancing around us as Stephanie stormed angrily over to a bar stool and sat down. Several minutes, later Cynthia and Stephanie walked outside and sat in lounge chairs beside the pool. Stephanie would occasionally look angrily into the room.
We danced several more songs together. We were having a lot of fun. It was the first time in several months that Jason acted like he was having more fun with me than Stephanie. We made several more trips to the bar to refill our drinks. All of us were having trouble standing without reeling back and forth.
“I think I’m drunk,” laughed Jason.
“I know I’m drunk,” responded Chris.
“I know we’re all drunk,” I laughed.
Suddenly, Stephanie and Cynthia came walking into the den. Stephanie stepped up to Jason and stuck out her hand.
“Give me your keys,” she demanded angrily.
“Why?” he stumbled back and fell into a chair.
“Because you’re drunk,” she replied. “Cynthia and I are leaving.” She fished around inside his pocket and took out his keys.
“Hey,” laughed Jason. “Don’t stop. Keep looking and you might find something else.”
“You wish.” She turned and grabbed Cynthia’s arm, leading her to the door. Cynthia turned and gave me a timid wave. When they left, Stephanie slammed the door shut.
“Bitch,” exclaimed Jason angrily. Chris and I started laughing.
We sat around the bar and had another tall drink. We were really drunk. I don’t think any of us were talking in complete sentences, but we seemed to understand each other.
Chris walked over to the sofa and fell onto it. Within seconds, he was passed out. Jason and I looked over at him and laughed. His head was back and slobber was leaking out of the side of his mouth.
“Damn,” exclaimed Jason. “That shit is gross.” He jumped up from the bar stool and stumbled across the room. “I gotta go take a piss.”
I sat and looked at Chris. Even in his drunken state, he still managed to look good- slobber and all. I started laughing when he curled into a ball, grabbed the pillow and held it tightly. He looked like a little boy sleeping in bed with his teddy bear.
When I finished my drink, I realized that Jason had not come back into the room. I walked down the hall to the large bathroom. He was lying on the floor. He had obviously passed out while pissing because his shorts were unzipped and stained with urine.
I struggled to get him to his feet and drag him across the hall to the nearest bedroom. I pulled him onto a king size bed and looked down at his piss-stained shorts. I decided to undress him so he wouldn’t sleep in wet clothing. I pulled off his shoes and socks and removed his tee shirt.
I then unzipped his shorts. I lifted him enough so that I could remove his shorts and underwear. It had been a couple of years since I last saw his cock. It appeared to have grown several inches. It rested limp against a set of large balls. His body was covered with a light dusting of hair on his chest and legs. He looked better than I remembered.
The stench of urine filled my nostrils. I reeled back and thought I was going to be sick. I rose from the bed and stumbled back into the bathroom. I found a clean washcloth, put soap on it and staggered back to the bedroom.
Jason was still lying as I had left him. I took the rag and began washing his stomach, legs, and finally his cock. It began to harden as I stroked the soap onto it.
“Oh yeah, Steph,” he mumbled as his cock grew rigid. “That feels good.” He was talking in his sleep and dreaming that he was having sex with his girlfriend. I continued to soap him as his cock grew to about seven inches
“Yeah!” he moaned. “Suck it, Steph.” His eyes were still tightly shut.
I then made the worse mistake of my life. I leaned in and took his cock in my mouth. I managed to engulf about five inches when he moaned loudly. “Oh, yeah!” he cried.
Suddenly, the light to the bedroom came on.
“Jason, are you...” I turned to see Stephanie and Cynthia standing in the doorway.
“You mother fucker!” Stephanie ran across the room and started swinging wildly at me. She hit me in my face, my back and arms- anywhere she could land a punch. I jumped off the bed away from her.
“I knew you were a fag, you son of a bitch,” she spat. She ran around the bed in an attempt to hit me. I jumped on the bed, stepped across Jason and headed for the door. As I ran past her, Cynthia gave me a sad look. She put out her hand to stop me, but I pushed her aside and ran down the hallway toward the door.
I raced down the drive, running as fast as I could. I ran out onto the road and turned left. The area was isolated, and there were no sidewalks. After running out of the development and onto the highway, I fell exhausted into some brush.
I lay there gasping for air. My lungs were aching and my chest was pounding. At that moment, I prayed that my heart would explode and that they would find me dead in the heavy thicket. There was no way I could ever face anyone again. Jason would hate me for what I did. Stephanie would probably assault me if she saw me again, and I knew that Cynthia would never talk to me after witnessing me sucking Jason. Even though she knew I was gay, I think she believed that someday I would get over him, and she would be there for me. Now she had seen just how desperate I was for Jason.
I had no idea what time it was. The last time I looked at a clock it was after eleven. It was when Chris was dancing with Cynthia. I figured it had to be at least one in the morning.
One of the bad side effects of running was that it sobered me up. I had run numb through the development, not thinking where I was going. However, now I was becoming aware of my surroundings and recalling what had led me to where I was.
The venomous words of Stephanie echoed in my ears. I recalled the sight of Jason lying naked on the bed, passed out from too much alcohol. The hurt look in the eyes Cynthia’s eyes as she reached out haunted me. It all came swirling back, like an avalanche rumbling down a mountainside. An agony consumed me and covered me like the snow at the bottom of a mountain.
I lay in the brush crying in desperation. I screamed and pounded the ground. If anyone had seen me, they would have thought that I was a madman. Perhaps I was. I was falling down a bottomless pit and there was no way to stop the decline.
I wanted to be dead. I listened for a car to come speeding down the road. Once, I got up on my hunches and prepared to jump out in front of an oncoming car, but I chickened out at the last minute. I didn’t have the guts to end my own despair.
I didn’t know what to do. Where could I go? I couldn’t return home. I was sure that either Stephanie or Jason would call my house in the morning and tell them about the disgusting act I had performed on him.
Going to Cynthia’s house was not even an option. Her father was a preacher. As soon as he found out that I was a fag, he would cast me out as a sinner. He would no longer allow his daughter to associate with a person destined to hell.
I had no other close friends. Jason had been the only friend I ever needed. I was never comfortable in the company of other boys. I considered going back to Chris’s house, but I was sure he didn’t want to see me again after I had defiled one of his bedrooms.
I tried to fall asleep, but I couldn’t stop crying long enough to rest. Several times I had to vomit the alcohol from my stomach. I lay crying along the side of the road with vomit running out the side of my mouth and my body reeking of alcohol.
I started to panic when the sun began to rise over the horizon. I was afraid that there would be people out searching for me. I didn’t want anyone to find me. I was determined to run away and never return.
I cried again thinking that I would never see my mother or father again. I had always loved them, but I knew they wouldn’t want me to return to their home- not after the embarrassing thing I had done. How could I ever face my father again with him knowing that I had sucked Jason’s cock while he lay passed out naked on a bed? I would rather run away than to see the look of disgust on his face.
After waiting until most people had gone to work, I trudged down the road, jumping off whenever a car would approach. Chris’s home was probably several miles from town, so it took me a couple of hours to walk it at the pace I was going.
I was also getting extremely hungry. I hadn’t eaten anything since having the pizza the day before. Chris had supplied us with plenty of alcohol, but we had eaten nothing.
When I came to a carryout, I went inside and purchased a few bags of chips and some candy bars. It was the quickest thing I could go in and get. The storeowner looked at me cautiously when I approached the checkout counter. I must have looked a sight. My face was stained from crying all night. My clothes were dirty and soiled, and I reeked of alcohol. He more than once wrinkled his nose when I was standing before him.
I left and headed into town as I gulped down the food I had purchased. As I walked down the sidewalk, I kept turning around to watch the traffic. I ducked into an alley when I saw a police cruiser driving slowly down the street. I peeked out from behind a trashcan and saw him stop and peer into the alley. I was afraid that he might have seen me enter. I let out a sigh of relief when he pulled off.
It was still early morning, and I didn’t know where to go. I was aware that people had to be looking for me. I was, after all, only sixteen. I’m sure my parents had called the police and reported me missing. After talking to Stephanie, they would probably tell the police to take me to a juvenile detention center. Even if I decided that I wanted to go home again someday, I would not be welcomed. No parents want a gay, sex-crazed son.
I was also scared that Jason might have pressed charges against me for rape. Wasn’t that what I had done to him? I had taken advantage of him while he lay drunk in a bed. If he didn’t tell the police what I had done, then I’m sure that Stephanie would.
In the afternoon, I found a quiet place at a nearby park. It was far enough from the road that no one could see me if they drove past. It would also provide me some safety because there was a children’s park nearby.
I lay down under a large maple tree and fell asleep. I awoke several hours later when a fire truck went rushing by. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and sat up, trying to figure what time it was. I saw some small children walking home from school, so it must have been late in the afternoon.
I arose and walked across the park to a Burger King. Everyone stared at me when I entered and approached the counter. One little old lady wrinkled her nose and stepped away from me when I stood beside her.
I ordered several sandwiches and French fries. I was now out of money, and I knew it would probably be the last meal I would be able to eat for a while. I left the restaurant and returned to the park to eat. I remained there the rest of the day watching children playing in the park.
When the sun began to set, I thought it would be best if I went to a more lighted area. The park was dark and dangerous at night. I remembered watching in the news several years ago about a young woman being murdered in the park.
I headed into town and walked around looking in the store windows. Since it was after eight o’clock, most stores had closed. I ducked into alleys and store entrances when I would notice a police cruiser coming down the street.
Around eleven o’clock, I noticed a strange man following me. He must have been about fifty years old. He was short and fat, and he kept chain-smoking cigarettes. I walked quickly trying to escape him, but he would pick up the pace when I would walk faster.
When I came to a lighted area, I decided to confront him. I turned and stood before him. “What do you want?” I asked angrily, hoping to intimidate him.
“I just wanted to talk to you,” he said unthreateningly. “I saw you walking the streets. Are you a hustler?”
“A hustler?” I couldn’t believe he thought I was cruising the streets for sex.
“Yeah,” he replied. “You’re cute.” He reached in his pocket and pulled out a bill. “Here’s twenty bucks. Let’s go over there in the alley and you can suck my dick.”
“Suck your own dick!” I shouted as I tore off down the street. I was scared. I didn’t belong on the street. I didn’t know what to do or how to take care of myself. I wanted to go home, but I couldn’t. Tears started rolling down my face.
I ran up to a phone booth outside an all-night liquor store. Several winos approached me asking for change. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my last quarter. I took out my wallet and found a business card tucked safely inside. I dialed the number and waited until I heard the voice on the other end.
“Bernie,” I wailed. “I’m scared. Come get me!”