It's Not Easy Being a Tree
My alarm clock went off at seven. I set it fifteen minutes early because I have trouble
waking up in the morning. I usually have to lie awake trying to adjust to the fact I have to
get out of bed. Jon jumps out of bed as soon as it goes off and rushes into the bathroom
to take his shower before I get up.
I didn’t get much sleep last night. I kept thinking about Indyboi91. Even though I’d cum
looking at his profile picture, my erection wouldn’t go down. I like to fall asleep on my
stomach, but it’s hard to do when you’re lying on top of seven and a half inches of hard
Jon came in around eleven thirty last night. He didn’t care that he woke me up, even
though I wasn’t asleep. He turned on the overhead light and whistled a song while he
undressed. From his happy attitude, it was obvious he had gotten laid. After a quick
shower, he jumped naked into bed. I had to crawl out of my bed and turn off the light.
I was too tired to take care of business in the shower, so it didn’t take me long to get
ready for school. As I dressed, I kept thinking about the guy on the internet. I wondered if
I maybe knew him. He did appear to be around my age, but that was impossible. A person
has to be 18 to cam on the site; and since his dick was on full display last night, he has to
be old enough to be there.
I want to join, but there is no way I can. How am I going to get an ID that says I am over
eighteen? By the time I made my way downstairs and into the kitchen, I was resigned to
the fact I’d never see him again. Anyways, I’ve managed to live without him for sixteen
years. I guess a ten minute thrill on the internet isn’t going to be that life altering.
“Good morning, Dear,” my mother sang out when I walked into the kitchen. Glenn and
Glenda were eating cereal. Jon was probably downstairs working out on the treadmill. He
likes to run for about a half hour before driving to school.
Dad is never at the breakfast table. He’s the foreman of a lumber yard in town. He goes to
work at six and gets off around three. Mom is a secretary at the elementary school. She
was there when all of us kids attended. It was nice when I was in the early grades, but as
I grew older it was embarrassing to go to the same school where your mother works. I
couldn’t do anything wrong without a teacher threatening to go to the office and telling her
what I’d done. However, it’s not like I got into much trouble. Jon’s teachers visited her
I sat at the table and looked at the three cereal boxes on the table. It’s usually my
biggest decision of the day: Cheerios, Apple Jacks or Fruity Pebbles, Glenn’s favorite? I
studied them for a minute and then reached for the Apple Jacks. Glenn and Glenda began
arguing about a girl named Rhonda, who Glenda is sure has a crush on Glenn.
“She told Susie she wants to kiss you,” giggled Glenda.
“Ewww!” shrieked my little brother. “I’d rather kiss Ginger.” He reached down and grabbed
the cat off the floor and kissed her on her nose.
“Put the cat down while you’re at the table,” hollered my mother. She gave Glenn a
mischievous grin. “I saw Ginger licking her butt earlier.”
“Ewww!” screamed Glenn as he began vigorously rubbing his mouth with his shirt sleeve.
Mom, Glenda and I roared with laughter.
“What’s so funny?” Jon asked as he came walking into the kitchen. He didn’t have on a
shirt and his muscled chest glistened from his sweat.
“Glenn has Ginger’s butt smell on his mouth,” giggled Glenda. Jon shook his head and left
the kitchen when we started laughing again.
After breakfast, I returned to my room to get my book bag. Jon was standing at the mirror
putting the final touches on his blond hair. “You get that assignment done?” He asked as
he raised the brush and ran it across the top of his head.
“It’s in your book bag.”
He turned and posed for me. “How do I look?”
“Like a dork,” I replied smugly as I left the room.
“You would know,” he shot back as he followed behind me down the stairs.
I ride with Jon to school. He hates it and has told me numerous times, but no school buses
run out to our subdivision. I’d have to walk a mile to catch the nearest bus. “So?” Jon
replied when Dad told him I’d be riding with him last year. “The exercise will do him good.”
He only agreed to let me ride with him after Dad held out his hand and asked for his car
Jon always picks up two of his friends on the way to school. That is another reason he
doesn’t like me riding with him. Both are football players, and I usually sit in the backseat
and look out the window while they talk about sports.
One is Jon’s best friend, Connor Radford. When God created him, he threw away the mold.
He is one of the reasons I know I am gay. I’ve had the biggest crush on him for so long.
When Jon invites him over to work out in the basement, I try to find an excuse to go
downstairs. Since the washer and dryer room are in an adjoining room, I’ll take a load of
my dirty clothes down. I can then stare from the laundry room at Connor as he lifts
weights while I fold my clothes.
Connor is perfect. He has black hair that he keeps cut short. He has intense brown eyes
that seem to light up every time he laughs. My brother is ripped, but Connor’s body is even
more muscular. He also has an enormous cock that protrudes from his silk athletic shorts. I
saw him naked once in gym as he was coming out of the shower. I let out a slight gasp,
and then had to look around to see if anyone heard me. Since then, Connor has been one
of my favorite jerk off fantasies at night.
Connor is another wide receiver for our team. He’s actually a better player than Jon,
although my brother would never admit it. He’s scored almost twice as many points as Jon
His brother, Ross, sits in the backseat with me. He’s cute, too. If I wasn’t constantly
staring at Connor, I’d probably spend more time looking at Ross. He’s a junior and a
running back on the football team. He doesn’t get a lot of playing time because Jason
Taylor, a senior, is one of the best running backs in the state. When Ross does play, he’s
pretty impressive. He’s also a starter on the basketball team. Last year he was the high
scorer and received the MVP award at a sports banquet my father and brother forced me to
Ross’s hair is dark like his brother’s, but it isn’t exactly black. It’s more a dark brown, I
guess. He has brown eyes, and his face is narrow with a cute nose. He has just the
slightest hint of a fuzzy mustache. And dimples. God, when he smiles his mouth forms the
most awesome dimples I’ve ever seen on someone.
I hate riding to school with them. No one notices me. Jon seldom talks on our way to pick
up Connor and Ross. Ross will nod at me once he gets in the car, but then they begin to
talk sports. I’m left looking out the window. Ross tries to talk to me about school, but he’s
a junior and I’m only a sophomore. That doesn’t leave us much to talk about.
Today’s conversation was about girls. These are the conversations that disappoint me the
most. I know my brother is having sex with Debbie- probably a lot of sex. Connor isn’t
going steady, but from his conversations, he doesn’t seem to be suffering from blue balls.
Mondays and Fridays are always the worst days. Fridays are spent discussing how much
sex they are going to get on Saturday. Monday’s conversations are spent talking about how
good it was. I find that if I hum a song in my head as I look out the window, I can usually
block out most of what they are saying.
I haven’t yet figured out Ross. I know he is popular with girls because every time I see him
in the halls or at lunch he is surrounded by several female admirers. I guess if I were a
girl, I would be following him around in hopes that he would bless me with a dimpled
smile. However, he never brags about his conquest like Jon and Connor do. Occasionally,
they’ll ask him if he ‘got any,’ and he’ll raise his eyebrows and grin. I guess he is getting
it, he just doesn’t feel the need to brag about it. No one ever asks me that question. At
least I am spared from having my face turn every shade of red as I fumble for an answer.
So the rides to school are about as exciting as my life at home. I feel like I’m an outsider
looking in. I spend twenty minutes every day with three of the most popular guys in school
and it is as if I don’t even exist. I would bet on the days I stay home sick, they don’t even
notice I’m not in the car.
Jon dropped me off in front of the building while he drove around to the student parking lot
and walked in with Connor and Ross. Usually, they are greeting by other athletes arriving
to school at the same time. I’ve passed them in the hall on my way to homeroom.
Sometimes there are as many as fifteen guys bantering back and forth on their way to
Homeroom is boring. We go to a room and sit for ten minutes while a teacher takes
attendance. Occasionally, she will unenthusiastically read an announcement from the
office, usually about an upcoming dance or an extracurricular activity. Most of the students
talk as the teacher drones on about some chess club tournament next Tuesday after school.
The bell rang and I headed for Mrs. Chapman’s literature class. An observer from a nearby
college was monitoring the class. Her name was Miss Strutman, and she had been sitting
in on our class each Thursday for several weeks.
When the bell rang, Mrs. Chapman asked us to get the assignment out while Miss
Strutman walked around and collected them. “Today class,” Mrs. Chapman announced,
“we’re going to do something different. Miss Strutman wants to get some idea how
students in high school write.” Mrs. Strutman handed the papers to Mrs. Chapman. She laid
them out on her desk face down and spread them out. “Miss Strutman will pick out a
paper. As you can see, they are face down, so the selection will be entirely random. If she
selects your paper, please come to the front of the room and read what you have written
about why it’s not easy being you.”
“No! No! No!” I shouted silently to myself. “I’m screwed! I just know she’s going to pull my
paper. I just know it!”
I crossed my fingers and prayed silently to any god that might hear me. “Not me, please!”
I held my breath while she pulled the first paper from the stack.
She looked over at the other side of the room. “Benjamin, will you come read your paper,
please?” I let out the breath I’d been holding. If anyone had looked at me, my face was
This went on several more times, and each time I reacted the same way. I kept watching
the clock behind Mrs. Chapman. Only ten more minutes remained. Bev Winslow finished
reading hers and Miss Strutman shuffled the papers and pulled another one out.
My heart stopped! She looked back at me and smiled. “Woody. Will you come read yours
please?” I thought my heart was going to stop as I fought for air to breathe.
“Do I have to?” I muttered nervously.
“Yes, Woody,” smiled Miss Strutman. “You have to.”
I slowly rose from my desk and approached the front of the room. I decided to make one
last plea. I looked anxiously at Miss Strutman. “Do I have to do this?” She didn’t say
anything. She simply smiled and thrust my report at me.
With trembling hands, I took the paper and turned to face the class. I looked out onto the
twenty students who are watching me with eager anticipation. I think they sensed that
something was going to happen. All the other students seemed excited to be chosen to
read what they had written. Miss Strutman was generous with her praises, even to those
students who hadn’t written anything especially interesting.
“Go ahead, Woody,” encouraged Mrs. Chapman from behind me. I cleared my throat and
looked down at the paper. I could hardly read it because of my trembling hands.
I took a deep breath and read, “It’s not easy being a tree.” There was silence for a few
seconds before Jeff Bench, one of my friends, started giggling. Soon several more students
“Settle down, class,” admonished Mrs. Chapman. When the room quieted again, I began to
read my report about oak trees. Several students stared giggling and soon everyone in the
room burst into laughter.
“You may sit down, Woody.” I heard Mrs. Chapman say behind me after I’d read several
paragraphs. I didn’t have to turn to know that she was upset. I could hear it in her voice.
“You’re such a dufus,” laughed Jeff as I dejectedly made my way back to my desk. I
gathered my books, put them in my book bag and placed it on the desk. I lay my head
down on it, closed my eyes and waited for the bell to ring. Miss Strutman called two more
students to the front before the dismissal bell finally rang.
When it did, I picked up my book bag and rushed from the room. I didn’t even bother to
look at Mrs. Chapman or Miss Strutman. I knew what they were thinking about me. I
already expected to fail the assignment. I just wasn’t prepared to embarrass myself before
the entire class in doing so.
A couple of students in second and third periods kidded me about the report. Since the
school is small, counselors do block scheduling, meaning I share most of my classes with
the same students.
My friend, Jeff, is my worst tormentor. I guess he is about the closest person I can
consider a best friend. We are a lot alike. He is rather shy and doesn’t associate with a lot
of people. He's kind of attractive. I say kind of because I never really think about him as
being anything other than just a friend. He’s tall and slumps when he walks beside me. He
tries to make me feel more comfortable by being more my size, but it just makes him
One thing about him I don’t find appealing is the glasses he wears. They make him look
like a geek. They have a black frame with a light black tint. He said he saw a guy in an ad
wearing them; so when he got new glasses last year, he talked his mother into buying
them for him.
I saw him naked in the shower once and he has a nice body. It surprised me because I
didn’t think he’d be the kind of guy who would work out since he doesn’t show any interest
in sports. I guess there is something else we have in common- he doesn’t talk too much
I often wonder if he is gay. Last year I had this feeling that he had a crush on me. It
didn’t last too long, but for about a month he’d call me almost every night and we’d talk.
We didn’t talk about anything special, we’d just talk. It was as if he just wanted me to
stay on the phone with him. I always thought it was strange that we’d talk about anything
and everything-except girls. I did ask him one time if he had a girlfriend and he made
some lame excuse about his mother not letting him date.
We pal around at school some, but we don’t see each other too often outside of school.
His mother has picked me up a few times and we’ve spent the day at the mall. He lives on
a small farm outside of town and spends most of his time doing chores. He’s the only boy,
so he says there’s always something to do and it doesn’t leave him much time to do
anything else. I guess that’s why he has the body he does. I’d look buff too if I was
tossing hay in the barn all day.
“Hey, Tree,” he giggled as he sat down beside me. “I can’t believe you had the balls to
read that shit in Mrs. Chapman’s class.” He started laughing louder. “If you could have
seen her face.”
“Just shut up, Jeff.” I turned and gave him an angry look, but he burst out laughing. I tried
to frown, but soon found myself laughing. I gave him a puzzled look. “You think I’ll get an
‘A’ on it?”
“Yeah,” he laughed. “A for asshole.” He stopped laughing and tried to catch his breath.
“No,” he grinned. “Maybe it’s A for acorn.” He stopped laughing, waiting for me to say
something. “Get it?” he asked. “Acorn. Oak tree.” I rolled my eyes and groaned.
“Don’t give up your day job,” I laughed. “You’ll never be a comedian.”
After class he walked with me to the cafeteria. We sat at a table with two girls, Anna
Bateman and Kate Combs. We’ve been friends since the first grade, and until this year
we’ve always been in the same classes. Now they are in a different block than Jeff and me.
However, we still eat lunch together.
Anna is very smart. She’s the reason I was able to pass math in the fifth and sixth grades.
I sat beside her and she let me copy her papers. I always failed the tests, but the daily
work kept me from failing the class. She has red hair that she usually keeps pulled back in
a ponytail. She also has a lot of freckles on her face. Mom drug me once to see the play,
Annie. I went back the next day and told Anna she looked just like the red-haired girl in
the play. She told me she used to love her mother to read her the book when she was
little. She’d point at the picture on the cover and ask, “Is that me Mommy?”
If Jeff is my best friend, then Kate would probably be my next best friend. In the second
grade we became boyfriend and girlfriend. I even told my mother that we were going to get
married when we got bigger. She laughed and said, “That’s nice.”
Then in the third grade I went through that period where I thought girls were ‘icky.’ I told
Kate that her feet smelled and she slapped me. We didn’t talk for about three months.
Then I gave her a Valentine’s Day card that I had made just for her. I wrote on it that I
was sorry and her feet didn’t really stink. She started talking to me again, and we’ve been
best friends since.
Kate is like the mirror image of me- only she’s a girl. She doesn’t have a lot of friends and
spends most of her nights at home reading. She’s pretty, but I don’t think she’s ever been
able convince herself that she is. Boys don’t usually talk to her because she has this
intimidating stare that makes them feel inadequate. It’s like she’s saying, “Fuck off. I
don’t want to talk to you.” But she doesn’t do that with me. When we’re together, it’s like
everything is okay and safe. If I wasn’t gay, I’d probably date her. However, for some
reason, I think she may be a lesbian. She’s never seemed interested in girls, but she
doesn’t like boys either- with the exception of me and Jeff, that is when he isn’t acting like
Jeff started razzing me as soon as we sat down. He couldn’t wait to tell Anna and Kate
what I’d done in first period. “And then he stands there with his short self,” he had to
catch his breath while he tried to stop laughing. “Get this,” he laughed, “He tells the entire
class he wants to be an oak tree.” He looked over at me and slapped me on my back.
“That was so funny, Woody.” Anna was giggling at the story, but Kate gave me a
“I didn‘t say I wanted to be an oak tree,” I insisted. “Can’t we talk about something else?”
“Sure, Tree,” he responded with a laugh. Anna giggled while Kate frowned at him and took
a sip of milk.
We spent the rest of the lunch period talking about nothing in particular. Most of our
conversations are about our teachers and homework assignments. Since none of us are
involved in any extracurricular activities, and our lives are basically boring, there isn’t much
Suddenly, Jeff got all excited. “I know what I was going to tell you guys.”
“What?” Anna asked.
“My Dad and Mom got me a new laptop computer.” He then told us how helpful it is for him
to now do his homework without having to go to the library after school. When I suggested
that he will probably spend more time playing video games than he will be doing school
work, he replied enthusiastically, “Hell, yeah!” Everyone at the table laughed.
A couple of students in my afternoon classes kidded me about my report in Mrs. Chapman’s
class. It had been a while since I’d gotten so much attention. “I’ll have to screw up more
assignments,” I thought to myself.
My last class of the day is computer science. I know all about computers, but it is a
required class. The school feels that all students should have a good background in
computer technology because they say our future success will depend on it. I hate to admit
it, but I agree with them. Since I’m only a sophomore, I still have another year to decide
what I want to major in when I go to college. I thought once of being a pharmacist
because they make a lot of money. But then I read on the internet that you have to take a
lot of chemistry and advanced math classes, so I’ve given up that idea. Maybe I’ll be a
journalist. I like to read and write, and it doesn’t require any math or science classes.
I finished my assignment quickly. When I looked at the clock there were still twenty
minutes remaining until the bell. I thought about going to the website where I saw
Indyboi19 last night, but I’ve heard rumors that a woman sits in an office somewhere and
monitors what we do on the computer at school.
No one believed it until last year when Paul Armstrong, one of our classmates, somehow
managed to bypass the restrictions on our computers and visited a porn site. Other guys
who watched him do it said it was a really nasty sex site. There were video samples that
one could watch that tried to lure you into joining.
When we entered class the next day, Mr. Calloway, the principal, was waiting by Paul’s
cubicle. Paul was escorted out and given a five day suspension. To this day, we don’t know
if that woman watched him or another student reported him. However, it does frighten us
from attempting to go into restricted websites.
Kate was waiting for me outside on the sidewalk when school let out. Dad picks me up
after school, but I usually have to wait about twenty minutes. Sometimes it may be an
hour if something happened at the plant that particular day. I had to walk home last year
when a fire broke out just before he was leaving. I could have waited for Jon, but walking
home was better than watching a bunch of guys practicing on the football field.
“Hey, Woody.” Kate smiled as I approached her. She only lives two blocks from school, so
she often waits around with me until Dad arrives.
She gave me a worried look. “Is everything all right?”
“Why do you ask that?”
“I don’t know,” she replied as she shrugged her shoulders. “You just seemed upset today
at lunch when Jeff was teasing you.”
“It’s okay.” I tried to force a smile. “You know how Jeff can be.”
“But I don’t understand why you wrote something like that,” she said. “I have Mrs.
Chapman fifth period. I didn’t particularly want to write about me either, but I did.”
“Yeah, well.” I walked over and kicked a stone down the sidewalk. “At least you didn’t
have to read yours in class.”
“But why did you write about a tree?” There was a concerned tone to her voice. “You could
have just written a bunch of crap like I did.”
“I’m not good at writing crap,” I replied as I turned away. “It would sound stupider than my
real life, anyway.”
She walked around and faced me. “I don’t get it, Woody.” She stared into my eyes as if
she was trying to read me like a book. “You’re cute and smart.”
“I’m short and skinny,” I replied sorrowfully as I walked away.
She hurried to catch up with me. She reached out and touched my arm, stopping me.
“We’ve known each other for a long time.” She looked like she’s getting ready to cry.
“Would you tell me if something was really wrong?” She squeezed my arm tighter.
Just then Dad pulled up and honked the horn. “I gotta go.”
“Woody?’ Kate pleaded.
I looked over at my dad’s truck while he motioned for me to hurry. “Yeah, okay,” I said
quickly. “I’ll tell you if something is wrong.” I kissed her quickly on her cheek, turned and
ran to Dad’s truck.
On the way home, Dad asked me about school, but I knew he really wasn’t interested
unless it involved sports. He and Jon can talk for hours, but our conversations are always
strained. Sometimes I suspect he feels like Jon, I’m an embarrassment to him. I know he’d
never admit it, but it’s probably true.
When we arrived home, I stopped by the kitchen for a snack while Dad went into his
bedroom for a quick nap before Mom gets home. I usually have about a half hour alone
until Mom and the twins arrive.
I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then headed up to my room. Even though
Dad was in his room asleep, I still locked the door before going over to my computer and
turning it on. I take advantage of the times alone after school to satisfy my raging
I typed in the website that I visited last night and I was surprised to see a message
waiting in my inbox. In fact, there was an icon flashing that indicated I had two messages.
I opened the first one. It was from Indyboi91. He had sent it last night after I’d logged off.
Indyboi91: where did u go?
I opened the second one.
Indyboi91: cum see me ill be on for awhile
I went to the chat room to see if he was online. He wasn’t. Another guy whose profile said
he was twenty-two was camming. I attempted to watch him, but I received the same
warning as I did the night before:
ELMERFUDD: SHOW PROOF OF AGE BEFORE CONTINUING. REGISTER WITH A VALID
CREDIT CARD OR HOLD YOUR ID UP TO YOUR WEBCAM SO WE CAN VERIFY YOUR AGE.
YOU WILL NOT BE PERMITTED TO ENTER CHAT ROOMS UNTIL YOU DO SO. THANK YOU.
“Dammit,” I moaned. It was frustrating to know naked guys were only a click away, but I
couldn’t see them. I returned to the message Indyboi91 sent me and typed a reply.
ElmerFudd: i’m sorry but i can’t see you. I can’t register
After dinner, I finished reading the Old Man and the Sea. I struggled doing my algebra
homework. Thank goodness they put the answers in the back of the book. I’ve never
understood why they do that. I guess it’s for mathematically challenged students like me.
If I know the answer, I can usually work backwards to get the answer.
It was around eight when I finished. Jon was downstairs working out in the basement.
I went over to my computer and opened my email. I had a message from Indyboi91.
Indyboi91: whats the problem? do what I did- get a fake id
I now knew he had to be younger than eighteen. I wondered how old he really was. Could
he actually be my age? And then another thought hit me- could I know him?
If he is my age, then he has to attend my high school. Since we are a small community,
we only have two elementary and middle schools and only one high school. He looked too
big to be in middle school, so he has to attend my high school.
I tried to remember what he looked like last night, but I mainly focused on his cock in the
brief time I watched him. His body was fairly smooth with a nice bush and long cock. He
could be almost anyone. From what I saw, he could be any guy I’ve seen changing his
clothes in gym class.
Suddenly, I received another message.
Indyboi91: so? you gonna do it
I have to find a way to see him again. There’s no way I can ask him who he is. He would
want to know who I am, and I’m not brave enough to tell him. What if I do know him and
he tells everyone what I’m doing?
I don’t know why I’m worried about it. After all, he’s the one jerking off on cam. But I am.
If I told him who I am, then I would be telling him I’m gay and I’m not ready to do that
yet. I let out a sigh and responded to his message.
ElmerFudd: I’ll see what I can do
I then hit send and returned to his profile page. I was able to jerk off before Glenn and
Glenda came up the stairs to go to bed.
Chapter 3 Return to TMJ