Window Stories
Chapter 7
When Jason came to get me for my therapy session the next morning, I was curious how the lunch date with Colin went. However, I wasn’t sure that he knew I was aware of it. I’m not one to play matchmaker, but I was very interested in getting them together. They seemed like a perfect couple.
I’m already very fond of Colin. He’s the grandson I never had. He even admitted that he considers me like a grandfather. I’ve known Jason for several months. He’s a hardworking and dedicated trainer. I’ve never seen him get upset, and I have certainly given him reason to lose his temper. When I first arrived, I was quite disagreeable. I hated that my son had dumped me in this place. However, I was beginning to feel at home. Mrs. Sullivan is a wonderful nurse. Like Jason, she is very patient with me. She’ll just leave the room if I become too contrary. It used to anger me because I didn’t feel that she respected me. Now, I know she does it to maintain her own sanity. I can only imagine what she has to put up with on a daily basis. I participate in social activities that are arranged for us. Most of the patients I would never consider a friend. And I’m sure they feel the same way about me.
I was going to start discussing Colin as Jason had me doing some stretches, but he began the conversation. “Phil,” he asked, “What do you know about Colin?”
“Why?” I teased. “Why would you want to know about him?”
He positioned me on a bench and turned to speak. “Come on, Phil,” he said excitedly. “I know that you know we had lunch together yesterday. Colin told me.”
“Yes,” I replied. “Colin did mention it.”
“So,” he asked. “What’s he like?” He cleared his throat and hesitated before asking, “Is he gay?”
I began to laugh. “He asked me the same thing about you.”
“So, he is?” asked Jason excitedly.
I shook my head and said, “Don’t you boys have any sense of gaydar?”
“Sure, Phil,” he replied, “But I don’t want to push Colin. I like him, and I don’t want to make him angry by assuming the wrong thing.”
“Look, Jason,” I tried to assure him. “He has agreed to go out with you Saturday to the movies. He ate lunch with you yesterday. I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”
“He’s a great guy,” he remarked. “I don’t want to mess this up.”
I warned, “Just be careful, Jason. Colin is a little fresh. He’s not had a lot of experience with men. Have you?”
Jason smiled nervously and looked out the window. “I’ve been around,” he admitted. “I came out in high school, and I dated quite a few guys.” When I laughed, he stopped me. “No, Phil. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. I’m not a cock whore. It’s just that guys were always hitting on me. Hell, I was young. What was I to do?”
“What about now?” I asked. “How old are you?”
“I’m twenty-four,” he replied. “But I’m ready to settle down. I want someone to share my bed with on a permanent basis. I’m tired of these occasional booty calls.”
“Just go slow,” I warned. “I will tell you this. Colin likes you. I’ve watched him when you’re around. Colin is grounded. If you push him too hard, you’ll lose him.” I grinned and added, “Besides, he’s like a grandson to me. If you hurt him, then I’m going to have to kick your ass.”
Jason leaned back and roared with laughter. “Kick my ass? Hell, Phil. You can’t even raise your leg?” He moaned when I threw my elbow into his side.
“Okay,” laughed as he helped me into my wheelchair. “I get the message.” I didn’t have to turn to see the wide smile on his face as he took me to my room.
I ate lunch and waited for Colin to arrive. He didn’t mention not visiting me, so I had assumed he would. I have to realize that he is extremely busy. He can’t just spend the day with me. I was looking forward to what he had to say about his lunch date with Jason yesterday. I was watching a movie on television when Mrs. Sullivan entered. She appeared extremely upset.
She didn’t say much as she flitted around the room tidying things up. She always asks me how I’m doing, but today her mind seemed to be preoccupied. When she came out of the restroom after cleaning it, I asked her how she was. She stopped in the middle of the room and began sobbing. I asked what was wrong.
“He didn’t come home last night!” she cried.
“Who?” I asked. I was pretty sure she was talking about her son, Stanley. However, it could have been her husband or family dog.
“Stanley!” she cried. “We got in a horrible argument, and he stormed out of the house. He never came home. My husband drove around trying to find him, and I called everyone he knows. No one has seen him.” She sat down in a chair and wept uncontrollably. “I just know something awful has happened.”
“Why do you think that?”
“When he left,” she sobbed, “he said he was going to kill himself.” I watched as she was overcome with grief. I wasn’t sure what had happened, but she seemed sure that he would hurt himself. When she settled down a little, I asked what happened.
She said her husband had walked into his room unexpectedly to ask him a question. It appeared he had caught Stanley looking at a porn site on his computer. I laughed and said, “What boy hasn’t looked at porn. I don’t understand why that is such a big deal.”
She replied tearfully, “He was watching gay porn. Randy says he was watching two boys having sex.” She again began to cry uncontrollably. “It was horrible. Randy threw his computer across the room, and he and Stanley got into a terrible fight. They kept hitting each other. I couldn’t stop it. Stanley broke away and ran from his bedroom. I tried to stop him, but he said he was going somewhere to kill himself.”
I didn’t know what to say. It sounded like a dangerous situation. If he had fought so violently with her husband, then he probably felt he could never return home. I had dealt with many students over the years who had experienced similar situations. Some got better, but many didn’t. I was interested in one question.
“Did you know Stanley is gay?”
“No,” she cried. “We didn’t have a clue. He’s been moody lately. And he’s been giving us a lot of problems. We were afraid he might be taking drugs.” She stood and wiped the tears from her face. “I have to go talk to Mr. Maxwell and tell him I am going home. I can’t work worrying about Stanley.”
“I hope all goes well,” I said as she left the room. I thought to myself, ‘What a mess.’ It’s already difficult to come out to your parents. Having them find you watching gay porn is not the best way to do it. I hoped that her son found someone he could talk to that he trusted. If not, then I didn’t want to think what might happen.
About an hour later, Colin arrived. He was dressed in a suit. I admired how handsome and professional he appeared. I whistled and remarked, “Would you look at you. What’s the occasion?”
His face reddened as he looked down at himself. “When I arrived at my office this morning,” he explained, “my supervisor was waiting for me. He wanted me to do a presentation of our program to a business group meeting at the convention center. The person who was going to do it had called in sick.” He posed and smiled. “So, here I am.”
“You clean up nicely,” I responded as I admired his handsome features. I was going to remark that he looked like a bougie boy, but after yesterday’s conversation, I decided not to.
He sat down and apologized that he couldn’t stay long to visit. I told him I understood, and I appreciated that he had stopped by to see me, even though briefly. I then told him what had happened between Mrs. Sullivan’s son and her husband. He listened patiently and shook his head several times.
When I finished, he said he had a couple of friends on the police department. “When I get back to my office,” he said, “I’ll call around and see if I can find out anything.”
“I appreciate it,” I replied. “I just hope he hasn’t done anything drastic.” He rose, patted my arm and left the room.
Mrs. Sullivan came into the room later and told me that Mr. Maxwell had given her permission to go home. I felt sorry for her. I have dealt with distraught parents many times over the years. Most of the time the young person stays with a friend to cool off. Occasionally they may be picked up by the police and returned home. I was hopeful that this was the case with Stanley.
I didn’t sleep well because I had too much on my mind. I continued to worry about Mrs. Sullivan’s son. There are so many possibilities that can happen when a fifteen-year-old is involved. I kept wishing that she would return in the morning with a smile on her face. I also kept thinking about Colin and Jason. They seemed like they might be a perfect couple. I don’t want to push too hard, but I was going to try and get them together. I will never find love again, but I can at least live vicariously through two young men.
Mrs. Sullivan didn’t show up in the morning. Sarah, a young aide, took my breakfast menu and attended to my room. I asked her about Mrs. Sullivan, but she said she didn’t know anything other than she had taken a day off.
Jason was also rather quiet and subdued. He wasn’t his usual jovial self. I asked him about Mrs. Sullivan, but he said the same thing that Sarah told me. When he returned me to my room, Colin was waiting. They briefly stepped out into the hall to speak. When he returned, he had a smile on his face.
“Thank God someone around here is in a good mood,” I said. When I told him how everyone was quiet this morning, he agreed that everyone was probably worried about Mrs. Sullivan’s situation. I asked, “Were you able to find out anything?”
“I called my friend, Matt,” he informed me. “He’s a detective in the robbery department. He checked the reports, but he couldn’t find anything except the missing person’s report his father filed.” I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not. At least Stanley hadn’t been arrested. On the other hand, he was still missing unless he had returned home, and his family didn’t tell the police.
Colin sat back in his chair and said, “Let’s talk. You were going to tell me about going to college.”
I looked at the window and saw a number of people staring into the room. One in particular was a young woman with long sandy-colored hair. She was wearing a floral long flowing dress.
I began my story. “I believe I told you that I graduated in 1963.” He nodded his head. “The first few months were rather routine. The school was fifty miles away from my home. I drove back and forth every day that first year. It was kicking my butt.” Colin smiled and nodded his head.
“Then all hell erupted in November,” I said.
He gave me a puzzled look and asked, “What happened?”
I replied, “November 22nd happened.”
“What happened on that day?”
“God!” I moaned. “You have a master’s degree from a bougie college, and you don’t know what happened on November 22nd, 1963?” Colin pulled out his phone and began typing.
“Oh,” he exclaimed as his face reddened. “President Kennedy was assassinated. I learned that in school, but I forgot the date.”
“I’ll tell you what,” I responded. “There isn’t a person over sixty-five who can’t tell you about that date. We all remember where we were when it happened.”
He asked, “Where were you?” I looked over at the window and saw the president’s face.
“I was in class when it happened,” I replied. “The class ended, and as I was walking to my next class, I saw a couple of girls crying. As I walked, I saw more students with tears in their eyes. Finally, I stopped someone and asked what had happened. The girl I asked broke down and started crying. She told me that Kennedy had been assassinated in Dallas.”
“What did you do?”
“I went to my next class, but there was a sign on the door notifying students that the class had been cancelled. It was a Friday afternoon, so I was through for the day. I drove home, and my mother was in the living room watching television and crying. Everyone was in a state of shock.”
“Wow,” exclaimed Colin. “I couldn’t imagine what would happen if the president today got shot.”
“It was a different time then,” I explained. “The entire nation mourned. It didn’t matter what party you belonged to. Kennedy was admired throughout the world, so even other nations mourned his death. It is really hard to describe the mood that day.”
I asked Colin, “Do you remember the jet flying into the World Trade Center in New York City on 9/11?”
He shook his head and replied, “I was just a baby, but I remember reading about it.”
He laughed when I grabbed my chest and said, “Oh, God, I’m old.”
“So, what happened after Kennedy got shot?” he asked.
“It was a very strange time,” I explained. “They were able to arrest the killer, Lee Harvey Oswald.”
“Didn’t he get shot too?”
I smiled and said, “I guess they did teach you well. Yes, he was shot a few days after his arrest. It was a Sunday, and we were eating lunch and watching the television. A guy jumped out on live television and shot him. It was crazy.”
“Was it on CNN?”
“Oh, God!” I moaned again as Colin gave me a puzzled look. “No, it wasn’t on CNN. We didn’t have cable back then. We only had three channels- ABC, CBS and NBC.”
“Three channels!” he asked excitedly. “You only had three channels? What did you do?”
“We watched what we had,” I replied. “And we were happy to have that. And we also didn’t have color tv. We watched things in black and white.”
“I would have died,” he said. “I’m glad I was born in the twentieth century.”
“You young kids today,” I responded, “have no idea how things were back then.” I leaned forward and added, “But you know something?” He shook his head. “We were happier then. We didn’t have social media to tell us what to do. We did things our way.”
Colin looked at his watch. He stood and walked over to the side of the bed and asked. “How about some lunch?”
I looked up at the clock. It was almost noon. “They should be bringing me lunch soon,” I said.
“No,” said Colin. “Why don’t we go out for lunch?”
I gave him a puzzled look. “You mean like down to the cafeteria? I never eat there. I don’ t like watching old people drooling their food onto the table.”
Colin laughed and said, “Why don’t we go out to a restaurant?”
“Are you serious?” I asked. “I haven’t left this place since I got here.”
He explained, “I meet on Mondays with Mr. Maxwell and my supervisor, and we go over your case. I suggested that I could take you out for lunch or dinner sometime. They approved it. So, if you want to go out to lunch, we can.”
I didn’t know how to respond. I had assumed that I would probably die alone here and never see the outside world again. I wasn’t sure how I felt about leaving. I had become a recluse before Colin had arrived. I didn’t know if I was ready to interact with people again.
“Come on, Phil,” urged Colin when he saw that I was hesitant. “It will do you good to get out of here for a while.” He started to head for the door. “I’m not going to take no for an answer. I’ll go get a wheelchair and sign you out.”
He left before I had a chance to object. I felt I wasn’t ready. Besides, I hadn’t shaved in weeks, and my beard was scraggly. I also hadn’t had a haircut since arriving. It was rather long and unkempt. Several minutes later, Colin returned followed by Jason.
“I think it’s wonderful, Phil,” happily exclaimed Jason. “You’re finely getting to leave for a while. If you don’t mind, Colin invited me to join you.”
I was trapped. I could convince Colin that I didn’t want to go, but Jason would be much harder. I couldn’t use the excuse that it would be too difficult to use the wheelchair. Jason had been putting me in and out of it for months. I reached up and ran my hand through my hair. “I’m a mess,” I said. “My hair is too long.” I then ran my hand over my beard. “I’m just not ready for anyone to see my like this.”
“Nonsense,” replied Jason as he tossed my covers off me and had me sit on the bed. Before I knew what had happened, I was dressed to leave. I looked out the window and saw Dwight smiling approvingly at me. They wheeled me out to the curb, and Colin dashed off to get his car.
“I’m not sure about this,” I grumbled to Jason. “It’s been almost a year since I have been out of this place.”
“You’ll do fine,” he assured me. “I wouldn’t be approving this if I didn’t think you could do it.” I grunted when he added, “You still have a few more years left in you.”
I had no idea where we were going when they placed me into the back of Colin’s SUV. Fortunately, it was large and spacious. I didn’t want to admit it, but it felt good to be out of the center. I looked out at the familiar scenery I had missed the past year. Tears filled my eyes when we drove past the school where I was counselor for so many years. It didn’t seem to have changed at all. I tried to imagine who had replaced me.
Colin pulled into a strip mall and stopped. I looked out the window and noticed a hair salon. I asked, “Why are we stopping here?”
Colin laughed and replied, “Do you expect me to eat with a guy who looks like he just stepped out of a cave?” I tried to object when they helped me out of the car and into my wheelchair.
The stylist was very nice and patient. She simply smiled when I tried to object to having my hair and beard cut. A half-hour later when I looked in the mirror, I didn’t recognize the man staring back. I looked like I had twenty years ago. Dwight was behind me with a wide smile on his face. He nodded and disappeared.
“You look great,” said Colin as he walked up to me. He told Marcia, my stylist, what a great job she had done. When he wheeled me to the checkout, he pulled out his credit card.
“No,” I said adamantly. “I will pay for this. I’m not a charity case. I do have money. It will be nice to pay for something myself.” Marcia smiled when I added a twenty-dollar tip.
I was starting to get very hungry. I had no idea where Colin was going when he pulled out of the strip mall. Ten minutes later, we were pulling into an Olive Garden. He turned and asked, “Is Italian okay with you?” Jason said he was fine with it. I told him I could eat a plate of nice spaghetti. He smiled and responded, “Italian it is.”
I was embarrassed when they wheeled me into the restaurant. It didn’t bother me at the center because many of the residents use wheelchairs to get around. However, it was crowded, and I was afraid someone might notice me. As if he read my mind, Jason squeezed my shoulder and told me to relax. A nice young lady took us to our table. Our server was young and Hispanic. His name tag said his name was Emanuel. He was extremely attractive. He also appeared to be flirting with Colin and Jason as he waited on us. They seemed to be amused by the attention they were receiving.
“Lucky shits,” I laughed as Emanuel walked away. “What I would give to have a young man flirting with me again.”
Jason pointed out an elderly gentleman sitting with another man. He appeared to be about fifty years old. “That guy was been staring at you since we sat down.” When I looked over, he smiled and nodded.
Colin asked, “Do you know him?” I glanced over quickly and told them that he didn’t look familiar. He stood and walked over to us.
He smiled down and said, “Hello, Gentlemen.” He looked at me and asked, “Aren’t you Mr. Reid?”
I gave him a puzzled look and replied, “Yes, I am Phil Reid. Do I know you?” He asked a couple at a nearby table if he could borrow one of their chairs. They nodded, and he pulled up a chair to our table and sat down.
“I hope you don’t mind me joining you for a minute,” he said. He looked at me and said, “I’m Gary Dearth. You probably don’t remember me.”
I gave him a puzzled look. “Gary Dearth? You taught math at the high school, didn’t you?”
He smiled and replied, “You remembered?”
“Of course, I remember,” I said with a smile. It had been about twenty years, but I had a crush on Gary at that time. However, I was with Dwight, and he was with another man. We often talked about our relationships. We were both going through some troubling times. He transferred to another school, and I never knew what had happened to him. “Are you still teaching?”
“Oh, no,” he replied. “I retired five years ago. What about you?”
“Eight,” I said. I looked over at Colin and Jason. They had smiles on their faces.
Suddenly, the man who was at the booth with Gary called out his name. Gary’s face reddened. “I have to go. John is getting impatient.” I wanted to ask him if that was the man he had been with, but I didn’t. Gary reached for a napkin and wrote his phone number on it. He handed it to me and said, “Give me a call. We have a lot of things to catch up on.” He shook our hands and walked away. I watched as the other man stood, put on his coat, and they walked past us on the way out. Gary looked down and smiled as he walked away.
I looked at the happy expressions on Colin and Jason’s faces. “Don’t even go there,” I warned them. They sat back and laughed.
Email: ronyx@themustardjar.com
